Viewing a single comment thread. View all comments

Paperswisscheese OP t1_ixnkrzi wrote

Reply to comment by beast916 in 500 Days of Summer by Paperswisscheese

Okay, I didn't clarify. Doesn't it just seem strange that she's always willing to go near him? I know Tom is an emotional guy.

It's just Summer, she's so touchy and feely you know? Like if she sees Tom she'll smile a big smile, they haven't seen each other in a while, she'll mention let's go out for coffee, she asks him to go to a party at her place.She's so willing to be the initiator whenever she sees him. She should know that with a guy like that he takes things personally. You'd think she'd just back off and not see him at least for a while so he could get his mind together. Like who invites an ex to a party who you know is emotional, probably to just break the news to them that you're engaged? The kinda person Tom is who is so "romantic like" wouldn't like something like that.

And even at the end of the movie... she's trying to hold his hand, look into his eyes. She's so open. I feel sorry for Tom. Because during the whole movie he was led to believe that love wasn't this and that. And then near the end of the movie Summer says "oh yeah actually I fell in love, you were right"

What?

Please tell me I have a point about this😭😭

1

beast916 t1_ixnmlwx wrote

But you’re putting a lot of responsibility for how Tom would feel on her. She’s not responsible for his feelings; he is. And the thing is, she discovers she is capable of falling in love; it’s just not with him. And, while you certainly can feel bad for him, it’s nothing to hold her responsible for. Tom needs to do some self-examination and hold himself responsible, and it seems he is unable to.

11

DryingWashedClothes t1_ixnyfc4 wrote

I disagree that she’s not responsible for his feelings. The way you act towards someone else results in that person liking you, disliking you or feeling indifferent towards you. So her being intimate with him, saying things "I never told that to anybody" and spending a lot of quality time with him is leading him on as well as showing him that she is also interested in him despite her saying she’s not. She’s sending hardcore mixed signals which is kinda shitty.

You either want a relationship or you don’t, but then you have to act accordingly to your statement. If you don’t want a relationship then don’t act like you’re somebody’s partner, which she definitely did a lot of times.

In the end both characters are shitty people with wrong expectations in each other and that’s why they don’t end up together, but just framing Tom as the bad guy and her as innocent is disingenuous. He sucks for not listening to her, she sucks for using him despite it being obvious that he’s totally into her.

−1

beast916 t1_ixo0vdo wrote

I’ll say this as respectfully as I can; that is creepy “nice guy” privilege.

It’s gross.

I also never painted her as innocent. Examine why you had to lie.

4