mokutou t1_j6omr2x wrote on January 31, 2023 at 8:25 PM

Reply to comment by IntricateSunlight in Senior Care Worker Charged With Elder Abuse After 94-Year-Old Man Dies From Drinking Cleaning Fluid by apple_kicks

I agree for the most part, but I also want to say that not every family can handle that. Some people need more attention and skilled medical care than a family or even a home health nurse can provide. Some families cannot shoulder the emotional costs of bringing a beloved family member home to die in their care, or do not have the means, particularly low-income families. I’ve been party to some very respectful, peaceful passings in both a skilled nursing facility and a hospital. The availability of hospice facilities and in-hospital end of life care is not necessarily doomed to be an emotionally antiseptic experience.

IntricateSunlight t1_j6op1nl wrote on January 31, 2023 at 8:40 PM

Okay I agree with this. Like for example i am the youngest and personally I dont think I'd be able to bear that kind of emotional burden my cousin did with my aunt. I am aware that if my parents are in that situation I am not the one for that. Luckily there's 4 of us, 3 girls and 1 boy so one of us girls will probably be it. I am pretty squeamish about death and a lotta medical stuff. I dont even like needles.

mokutou t1_j6or9u9 wrote on January 31, 2023 at 8:53 PM

It’s good to be realistic with your own limitations. Being a caregiver for a loved one is hard, even when the more difficult aspects of it wouldn’t bother you in a less personal setting. It wouldn’t serve you or your family if you had to bear the weight of caregiving when it is immensely psychologically taxing, in addition to the emotional aspect of preparing for loss of a loved one. You’d be surprised what you can handle when you’re in such a situation, I will say, but it shouldn’t be expected of you. Good on you for recognizing that your best support would come in other forms.

IntricateSunlight t1_j6ov3ga wrote on January 31, 2023 at 9:17 PM

I also have ADHD which is classified as a disability and GAD so yeah I ain't the one for that task. I am however trustworthy and somewhat responsible. My sister told me my parents are planning to leave their house to me and I wouldn't be surprised if its us two youngest girls handling much of the administrative side of that.

Even though I'm only 29, my parents just turned 70 and its something real to think about.