Back in 2019, right at the beginning of COVID, I became quite isolated from family and friends. It suited me at the beginning, but little did I know that my curiosity would forever scar me mentally.

I would often upload YouTube videos of myself browsing the darkweb for fun, and until December 4 of this year, as usual, I'd have a brief run through user-submitted links to make sure everything was ok for YouTube and its rules. I must have been about 45 links down when I clicked it.

The link opened a new tab, and a video began to play. I could see one person lying on a bed and another one hooded and masked standing over the top of him on the right side of the bed, and that's when he proceeded to stab the person laying down over and over again. At first, it didn't really phase me, I've seen videos like this before, I thought until the person finished stabbing the body got up and then began to cut through the meat around the arms and legs, the bed now covered in blood, and the hooded/masked man showing each body part to the camera.

I sat through the first 7 minutes thinking to myself, "This is a disturbing video to say the least," until I realised that it wasn't just a pre-recorded video, it was actually a live stream, and just as the masked man finished his work, he stopped and walked towards the camera, reaching into his pocket and placing it directly in front of the camera, "Your Next."

The panic set in, and I jumped back from my laptop, that's when I realised my camera was on; the screen went black, and my name, address, and telephone number in big white letters flashed on the screen.

I quickly pressed the power button, but it did nothing. I slammed my laptop shut, turned it over, and ripped the battery out. In my panic, I actually destroyed the laptop, which was stupid, but I wanted that to be the end of it.

A few weeks had gone by, and even though I was paranoid beyond belief, I thought it was probably just someone messing around. I was headed out to the shop just down the road when I bumped into someone. I felt a sharp prick on my hand as we collided, thinking nothing of it. I continued towards the shop until my legs began to buckle from under me. I knew what had happened. I'd been spiked when we bumped into each other. Everything around me started to go black. I tried fighting the drug, but the drug finally took over, and I collapsed in the street. 

I thought I was done for until I woke up in the hospital a few hours later, dazed and confused. Panic set in, and the doctors had to restrain me until I calmed down. They told me I'd been given some drug to knock me out and proceeded to give me my stuff back. There was a note that read, "Never come back to the dark web; this is your one and only warning."

Ever since that day, I've stayed clear of the darkweb, but even now I still feel as though I'm being watched.