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wintrysilence t1_iyhh0v3 wrote

Anyone else really don't like Christmas? I actually feel worse around that season.

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pinupgal t1_iyhiuib wrote

I find that as I age, each year brings on new elements of wistfulness and inherent sadness of a lost past that can’t be recreated.

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Digerati808 t1_iylajv0 wrote

You can recreate this experience through your children or grandchildren.

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pinupgal t1_iylzaob wrote

True, but I’m at the gap in between kids and grandkids: Empty-nester.

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[deleted] t1_iyhs1bt wrote

[deleted]

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terepede t1_iyhvth0 wrote

Is wistful a weird word or something?

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earthtochas3 t1_iyhwopr wrote

Not at all! Just haven't seen it written out in months probably and now I've seen it like three times in the past 24 hours.

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frecklesmcnerdy t1_iyhiev3 wrote

Same for me. I used to love Christmas as a kid but now there just seems to be a lot of pressure to live up to those memories and it’s always a let down.

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pixievixie t1_iyjfzcd wrote

I feel like especially for moms. Like once we realized who REALLY made all the magic, and now it's US that has to make the magic, well, it's less magical (obviously not all moms, etc)

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Savior_Of_Anarchy t1_iyicrlb wrote

I've felt that way throughout my 20s. But this year will be my son's second Christmas, first one he'll actually open presents and I'm hella excited.

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Sapphire_Sky_ t1_iyhkfcp wrote

I've renounced Christmas and am now just looking forward to the winter solstice because that's when the days get longer again and it's just more meaningful to me. It also feels more intimate because it's something I do for myself. Obviously Christmas still happens around me but I put myself in the role of a spectator outside of all the craziness.

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Bjd1207 t1_iyi4kce wrote

What does that look like functionally? Like do you still get invited to parties and stuff? Do you go?

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Sapphire_Sky_ t1_iylpb7a wrote

I do spend Christmas eve with my family but because that day is no longer the big event that the whole month of december has been leading up to, I don't feel the pressure of it all having to go smoothly. If it gets too much, I'll excuse myself and head home. I know this won't work for everyone; my family is small and we live close together. But just this simple change in my mindset has helped me personally reduce the anxiety that the holidays would give me every year.

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PapayaSecret1794 t1_iyhp319 wrote

I’m with you, friend. Just lost my mom last month and this will be my first Christmas without her. Thanksgiving sucked. Getting used to the feeling.

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FatassTitePants t1_iyhxfwp wrote

For me, it's bittersweet but in a good way. I'm likely past the midpoint of my life and I do feel nostalgic but sad about how much loss I've experienced simply as a product of getting older and " things just aren't the same anymore."

On the other hand, I see it as my duty to make Christmas as fun and magical for my kids and other younger people, and that brings me a tremendous sense of joy and purpose this time of year.

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kiby-kiby t1_iyiolqk wrote

Yup. I grew up around alcoholics and drugs addicts so that sort of spoiled everything about christmas for me. Not to mention I'm non religious. Just hearing the music is enough to activate my fight or flight instinct lol.

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epik t1_iyhncgq wrote

used to love it, music included, but now i know we can never escape the same old christmas songs on loop for the rest of our lives. it fills me with dread the entire year.

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d-cent t1_iyhonjc wrote

I was going to say there are lots of people that have bad experiences from around the holidays. Every year the holidays bring up bad memories of that previous trauma. It goes both ways.

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lucyfurever t1_iyinthg wrote

I fucking hate Christmas, it fills me with dread. The holidays were really tough when I was a kid, since day 1. im not going to trauma dump here, but it’s relevant to share I had a religious cult parent who believed Christmas is sinful, and drunk parent that had custody of me at holidays. When I was finally an adult, I wanted to finally have the warm fuzzy holiday like in the movies. I had dreamed of it my whole life. So I really tried for a couple decades to have the Christmas magic. I had a few nice times, but it was empty of any meaning or purpose and ended up t times feeling was lonelier than doing nothing. I eventually gave up because in the end, it’s bullshit Christian holiday that won’t fix your fucked up family. And it’s a total resource suck, you will never be able to throw enough money at it.

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shadow_pico t1_iyi8308 wrote

I dread having to shop for gifts.

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NeuHundred t1_iyle4jk wrote

Same! I hate it so fuckin' much, I never have any idea what to give anyone else, and whatever I do find never feels like enough. I'm one of those people who holds real high standards for myself and I never reach them, so it's pretty depressing. My ever-elusive goal is to get it all done by Thanksgiving so I can just take the month off and actually enjoy the Christmas season.

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shadow_pico t1_iyloo30 wrote

This sounds like me 100%. LOL. I always try to buy gifts early. But the problem with that is forgetting you bought it or hid it so well that I can't find it. LOL.

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VitriolicViolet t1_iyt5lsf wrote

just dont? i havent bought gifts for anyone in 15 years, you make shit if you have to or just give people plants.

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shadow_pico t1_iyzjuk4 wrote

No no. That's so lazy. I like to at least put some thought into gifts that I give loved ones.

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Dreamcatcher993 t1_iyisvc1 wrote

Me.And used to love it lol.Apart from learning it's same as saturnalia, I lost everyone I cared and became immune to any mental mass activity.

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puppykawa t1_iyixrzs wrote

yep. worst holiday/season by far. sucks for people who don’t dig capitalism (spend all your money on gifts or no one will like you!), don’t have a good family, and it makes seasonal depression literally so much worse because you get gaslighted for not being in the holiday spirit lmao. actually, bethany, the sun won’t come out anymore, my family hates me, i’m broke, and now it’s fucking SNOWING

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VitriolicViolet t1_iyt5goj wrote

yep.

an entire season dedicated to pretending like people care for each other. other then the family unit most people have little to no actual care for those outside that group.

for all the talk of sharing and togetherness go ask them if they would pay more taxes to help the homeless.

the spirit of christmas is mass virtue signalling by a population that spends most of its time shitting on those below them.

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