I fucking hate Christmas, it fills me with dread. The holidays were really tough when I was a kid, since day 1. im not going to trauma dump here, but it’s relevant to share I had a religious cult parent who believed Christmas is sinful, and drunk parent that had custody of me at holidays. When I was finally an adult, I wanted to finally have the warm fuzzy holiday like in the movies. I had dreamed of it my whole life. So I really tried for a couple decades to have the Christmas magic. I had a few nice times, but it was empty of any meaning or purpose and ended up t times feeling was lonelier than doing nothing. I eventually gave up because in the end, it’s bullshit Christian holiday that won’t fix your fucked up family. And it’s a total resource suck, you will never be able to throw enough money at it.