BF [33m] deeply unhinged and I'm [27f] scared

Submitted by ThrowRA-raid876 t3_127ywoj in relationship_advice

2 months ago my boyfriend's employer filed for bankruptcy, which is terrible but not a surprise.

My bf hasn't been able to find a job, but financially he is ok.

Meanwhile I've been thriving and doing really well. I used to be crazy crazy needy and codependent, and I've made a HUGE improvement. I can't stress this part enough.

This triggered something in him. Now he has strange behaviour. He wants to see me every day. He accused me of being secretive. Before I would be chasing him down, now he becomes angry and yells because I'm not at home enough.

He suddenly told me he was moving abroad and I didn't react. He later shouted asking why I wasn't angry and I said I'm honestly tired.

I've asked him if he wants to break up then just tell me, but he always has a way of putting it off.

I'm scared now. He is sullen, quick to anger, and doesn't have any sweetness left. After we have sex he bugs me on purpose by saying "I think I pulled out on time."

Am I somehow imagining things? I need advice

Tl;Dr bf has done a 180

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HHIOTF t1_jegga3l wrote

He is very, very controlling now that he feels he has no control in his life. He is trying to control you since it is the only thing he feels he can. Being out of work to a man is much harder since they are socialized to be bread winners.

Honestly, if you are scared I'd get out of the relationship. Fear is not normal and you should listen to that fear.

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AuntyVenom t1_jegfwvi wrote

How did he react with you when you were totally needy?

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ThrowRA-raid876 OP t1_jegilkf wrote

Mostly ignore me until I could get a hold of him. I had to beg for a phone call, beg him to return texts etc etc. He'd go away for the weekend and I'd have bad anxiety. He said it was a big problem in our relationship, so I thought fixing it would help.

Now I'm gone with friends a lot and just living independently. Everything has become worse.

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