Man, this entire thing is filled with red flags.

They are telling you to sabotage her life for their own selfish wants. And if you tell her, and she brushes it off, or excuses it, or pretends it never happened, you need to seriously re-evaluate being with someone that enmeshed with her parents.

You're gonna be dealing with them being involved in EVERY SINGLE MAJOR DECISION you make as a couple. For the rest of your life.

They are going to get a say in how you raise any future children, whether you like it or not.

I hope you're ready for that, if she can't break the spell they have over her.