Submitted by Guzzleman t3_z91tww in relationship_advice

I have been talking to this girl for around a month now, and I feel as if everything's going well, but as soon as a try to make plans with her, she goes ghost for a while. I have consistently been the one that attempts to make plans, and reach out to her to see how she is doing. I don't think, in the entire month I have been talking to her, she has attempted to make plans or check in on how I am doing once. Maybe this is due to the age or maturity difference? Also, I definitely don't consider myself mature in the general sense, but I do consider myself to be "emotionally available" and in touch with my emotions/how I am feeling.

I've only been in one relationship in my life (3 years), and I have never had this gripe (couldn't think of a better word). I definitely do want a long term relationship with this girl, but the feelings don't seem to be reciprocated. Am I looking to far into things, or is she just not interested/wasting my time?

P.S. I get into the toxic loop of checking to see if she is on her phone (mostly through snapchat) and will see she has been communicating with people through there, but not answering texts pertaining to the aforementioned plans.

I appreciate any time you take to read this, and any insight you may be able to give!

0

Comments

You must log in or register to comment.

AutoModerator t1_iyehnx8 wrote

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

  • We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

  • Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

  • No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

  • All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

  • What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.


#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

stereonix t1_iyei1g3 wrote

She's not meeting your emotional needs/is not emotionally available enough for you, and you'd be better off focusing your energy on someone who gratefully receives it and reciprocates it.

A guy I'm talking to is doing the same shit to me right now.

2

BinkoBankoBonko t1_iyei5dv wrote

I would stop texting her.

You will figure out if she is actually interested pretty quick. Let her do the reaching out and plan making. If she doesn't do it I think you would have your answer.

2

Guzzleman OP t1_iyej42w wrote

I'm sorry you're going through that, and thank you for your advice and the time you took to read me venting lol.

This advice has and will definitely help me, I can't thank you enough.

In your opinion, is this something I could have a talk with her about, or should it just be left alone?

2

Guzzleman OP t1_iyejc37 wrote

Thank you for your advice, I really appreciate it

I'm definitely going to do this moving forward, especially since all of the reaching out with no avail has been pretty exhausting.

1

stereonix t1_iyejgzx wrote

You've only been talking for a month, I don't think she'd really value your opinion enough to change her behavior or somehow magically become emotionally available/present.

2

Bushidobrown1985 t1_iyekdzy wrote

Sorry man but she's not interested. I wouldn't waste any time.

2