rasmusdf t1_iyep1mm wrote
Why should you accept that? In the end it is your decision. If it means a lot to you, why shouldn't he want to do that for you??
PiddleAlt t1_iyepxa4 wrote
If it means a lot to him, why shouldn't she want to do that for him?
Works both ways.
Curious_Lynx_3770 OP t1_iyf28bl wrote
I appreciate this being said. The "if it means a lot to you, why wouldn't he do it for you" comment has been said to me by my friends as well. I know it's said with good intent but marriage is no small thing.
Marriage did mean a lot to me yes. And you should want to do anything for your partner (to an extent lol) if they mean that much to you, yes. But my bf shouldn't have to give up his beliefs either. It truly can be argued both ways which is why these conversations we've had around marriage has been hard. We are each valid in what we believe and feel
PiddleAlt t1_iyf3ama wrote
Yeah, I apologize if it sounded like I was directing that at you. That phrase just triggers me. There wouldn't really be a situation if both people didn't have strong feelings about it.
Curious_Lynx_3770 OP t1_iyf3xoy wrote
Not at all, you're all good. I had meant I appreciated that you were saying that phrase could be said about me as well because it's true.
I feel the same about that phrase. I get it but I just think it can be an unfair statement sometimes
rasmusdf t1_iyeq61v wrote
Yeah, actually agree. Perhaps they can do the mature thing, communicate and work out a compromise.
ulose2piranha t1_iyeqog2 wrote
Why should he accept that? In the end, it is his decision. If it means a lot to him, why shouldn't she want to refrain from doing that for him??
rasmusdf t1_iyeu9h5 wrote
Relationships are about communication and compromise. Either of them might end up resenting the other if they don't reach a workable compromise.
ulose2piranha t1_iyeulwu wrote
Precisely.
But that's not what you initially said. I parroted back your comment and only changed the roles so you could see how ridiculous it sounded. I'm glad your actual position is more nuanced.
rasmusdf t1_iyeuux8 wrote
Yeah, agree - first post was a bit unnuanced.
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