You make him go to therapy for his gambling addiciton, take charge of your finances and let him do more parenting with his children.

It sucks but its still not as expensive and draining as a divorce. Couples counseling on top of that so you can have a outlet, too. The debt is still considerable managable. He will have to work harder and longer hours, so while shit is being set up, let him spend time with his kid so you can take care of some of the steps needed.

Make it very clear that you are at a loss and that he will have to show, through actions, that you did not chose the wrong person.

Sorry this is happening to you. I would also suggest to get a financial consultant.

> he will get it taken care of it without hurting our finances anymore

It is already very seriously impacting your finances, that ship has sailed.

You have a child to think about here, first and foremost. I very highly recommend you post your full financial picture (yours and his) on r/personalfinance and get their expert opinion. It will help you make a decision whether you see yourself clawing your way out of this with him, or if you want to move forward on your own.

> Sometime last year he received a 10k credit card that we agreed to keep away and maybe use it for a down payment on a house.

You would also benefit from increasing your financial literacy, you cannot use a credit card to make a down payment on a house. Have a look at the sidebar on r/personalfinance for the basics.

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