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PassingWithJennifer OP t1_jclkecu wrote

I feel it pretty bad I don't feel like I belong here and uneasy. I can leave whenever I want but there's never anything I want to do. I just drive around and waste gas. I bought a few things at dollar tree for the house like a bowl and stuff. I'm sitting on my bed with no idea what to do and a sense of dread of waiting out the time until my job at night. I also burnt some chicken on the stove and so it's kind of poisoned the air 😅

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_ism_ t1_jcm6smr wrote

i used to drive to my old spots and just park there like before for hours

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PassingWithJennifer OP t1_jcm8irk wrote

I understand, there was a brief bit for time I stayed with a partner off and on for a few weeks and found myself doing that too when he wasn't home. I've felt like doing the same. Yesterday I certainly did. I just went around and saw all my people trying not to go home. I've been home most of today. Since 1 at least. Burnt some chicken on the stove (I forgot to pick up cooking oil and thought eehhhh they have grease right?)

Noticed my fire alarms didn't go off even as it was choking me and my eyes. Hit the test button and they seem to work. I'm an electrician so I took it off the wall a little bit to inspect the wires and they were hooked up. Lights blinking. Still maybe something is off about them or I'm just unreasonably bored.

I found a very interesting game on PC that captivated me for a while. I've opened my laptop which just used to sit idle in my car for months and months. Got it and a metridvania called blasphemous. I got into metroidvanias homeless cause they're really quite fun without being too hard. This one seems a bit more souls-like but I guess that's OK cause I've been playing castlevanias on my phone and the bosses felt really weak. But it's still like I just want to progress without every single enemy being a dredge.

Kind of want to get a book shelf or build one at work. And fill it with stuff just so something is on the walls. Maybe tapestry. I have work in 5 hours at my night job do I'm gonna take a nap at 6.

I really appreciate everyone's enthusiasm and support here. I wasn't expecting this to blow up originally 😅

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