Does it fucking matter tho?

If you're wrong for not putting a glass in the dishwasher how is that justifying breaking trust and speak in a bad manner about the person you're sharing your life with.
Not even thinking about the disgust of meeting up with that person in an hotel room.

Even if he was wrong for being worse like not being emotionally available, how is it ever justified?

I'm not saying OP shouldn't be striving to be the best he can be or even try to fix his relationship.

But if you can't talk about the small stuff like not cleaning the dishwasher, don't even bother having a relationship.