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kingdaume t1_ir0u01s wrote

Reply to comment by 6ft9man in TIFU By Calling My Friend's Mom A Hoe by Quinn_eth

OP wasn’t a complete ass though. They made a normal, innocuous comment and apologized when it became clear they’d offended. Should have been the end of it.

What OP shouldn’t have to do is resort to groveling for their friendquaintance’s forgiveness when 1) it was such a tiny offense, and 2) the kid won’t even explain why they got so incredibly bent out of shape about it.

These comments are treating OP like they pissed on their mom’s grave — little over the top, no?

What’s truly crazy to me is how comfortable you felt slinging that final assumption about OP’s social life. Utterly baseless and, ironically, rude as fuck to say to somebody you don’t know!

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6ft9man t1_ir18lp6 wrote

They did something that caused injury to a friend. You own up to it and apologize. You have no idea why she's acting like that. For all we know, her mother may have been unfaithful to her partner. Or maybe mom is sick. Or there's abuse. None of which she's required to tell anybody. So, if you say something that causes pain, apologize for it.

Also, that's not groveling. That's simply giving a full and complete apology.

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kingdaume t1_ir18q9s wrote

They did apologize.

“I’m sorry for what I said; I didn’t realize it would be hurtful to you, but recognize and regret that it was and won’t do it again” is a full and complete apology. They don’t need to say they were “completely out of line” because they weren’t. At all. So why would there be any reason for OP to villainize themself?

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6ft9man t1_ir19sju wrote

They said roughly 'in sorry I hurt you". That's not an apology, that's an appeasement. They didn't take ownership of it, instead deflecting it to "i have no filter".

As stated in my previous post, there are steps to making an apology. You own up to your mistake, which op didn't. They shrugged their shoulders, said, 'that's how I am" and "I'm sorry your feelings got hurt".

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kingdaume t1_ir1cfr3 wrote

“I’m sorry I hurt you” is an apology, actually. It’s acknowledging you caused harm, taking responsibility, and expressing remorse.

“I’m sorry you got hurt” is a completely different statement, and not an apology.

You using them interchangeable here is deeply disingenuous and eyeroll-worthy.

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