Christmas has all the fights. And the same food. Worse travel conditions. And you also have to spend half your life savings buying presents for people. Not to mention being obligated to go to a dozen stupid holiday parties you don’t want to go but have to. And there’s having to listen to the same six stupid Christmas songs ad nauseam.

Thanksgiving is just a single day, with better weather, hanging out with the people you love, eating your face off, then drinking beer and watching football. THEN you get the rest of a 4-day weekend to yourself. And you’re done in a single day as opposed to having to deal with it for a month and a half. Thanksgiving rules.