In your 40s/50s: how/where to make new friends, contacts?

Submitted by DC-DE t3_10lvul2 in washingtondc

I'm asking less for myself but for someone I know.

Say you've been in DC for 15+ years, you're a professional woman in your early 50s with multiple degrees, a musician, roller skater, swimmer, childless, and in a long term relationship, so not looking to date, hookup, etc. Say you're also not into drinking, bar scene, etc.

Anyone else out there that fits a mold like this? Where do you find friends, people to hang out with, social circles?

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d1dzter t1_j5zjqz9 wrote

Each and every time this comes up, the formula is always the same but the variables are different.

  • do group activities: join a league, a club, whatever that aligns with your interests
  • be vulnerable and talk to people
  • ask people out on friend dates
  • put yourself in social contexts
  • colleagues aren’t always your enemy

It all comes down to joining a community and being friendly with people. Is this that New Yorker discussion group? Attending ANC meetings? Joining a yoga class? Attending a workshop? Taking a course?

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endlessly_apollo t1_j60hldu wrote

I imagine some version of this question will be asked one a week until forever—

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Initial_Run1632 t1_j620gjl wrote

I would add: maybe not even just vulnerable, but downright awkward. It may take multiple, direct invitations to get a bond going with someone you meet at events you enjoy

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meditation_account t1_j5zc93v wrote

Bumble BFF. It’s the friend portion of the Bumble dating app. Download the app, sign up for free and get on the BFF portion. Lots of people in the DMV looking to make friends.

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klubkouture t1_j607irh wrote

I had a neighbor like this. She was much older than me, but she became one of my best friends and we'd go out to eat and talk and stuff. You and your friend should throw a block party and invite all your neighbors.

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leagle89 t1_j5z9ruf wrote

Try meetup.com? There are plenty of groups in the DMV -- board game enthusiasts, running groups, workout groups, book clubs, etc.

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srandrews t1_j5zdxqc wrote

Play music with other musicians. 7DC's Flashband is a good way to do that.

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keyjan t1_j5zed6x wrote

not specific to your age group, but maybe some ideas here

r/washingtondc/comments/105tzl9/meeting_people_in_dc/

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sly_python t1_j60cr2d wrote

upvoting this to signal boost

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AnnaPhor t1_j60zadq wrote

This is written from the perspective of families with kids, but would work just as well for folks without.

Friday Night Meatballs

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rlpw t1_j6121az wrote

I wonder what folks expectations are for friends. Like are you high involvement and expect to text everyday and get a response immediately? Or do you just wanna get invited to the occasional house party?

I’m 40, gay married with two dogs. I moved here circa 2016 (but also was born and raised here). I feel like there’s always something to go to and most of the time we’re RSVPing regrets. Maybe the gay social circles are different.

Also I see enough washingtonianprob memes about dating here as a straight woman to know I’d have no hope.

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Doctor-Pavel t1_j61htho wrote

Dog parks. Everyone loves talking about their dog and cares about their dog. Love to see their dog flourish and be happy.

I'm a social illiterate and I've met and created friends if our respective dogs were friendly with each other.

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HimmiGendrix t1_j62a5n9 wrote

I'm a musician as well. It's hard AF to find good music conversations in this area. We're all a bit awkward cuz of the plague and whatnot...

Screw online based meetups, I do comedy open mic nights, coffee shops, music events, and sometimes go to TGI Fridays solo. Be bold!

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DC-DE OP t1_j6n8q2f wrote

I recommend Music Trivia Night at Songbyrd.

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Pinballerz t1_j61100j wrote

She sounds like a square, daddy-o...

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DC-DE OP t1_j61tklu wrote

Lol. What's that supposed to mean?

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