Atralis t1_jd0vui7 wrote on March 21, 2023 at 12:45 AM

Reply to comment by voicareason in Mountain lion claws Colorado man soaking in hot tub by kk4u

I'm just going to grab a snack with my trusty claw......

*Incomprehensible shouting and weird magic light shining in eyes*

Ah fuck its weird! Abort! Abort!

Atralis t1_jclm97d wrote on March 17, 2023 at 6:45 PM

Reply to comment by [deleted] in Pilot program begins for bulletproof shelter inside Alabama classroom by Picture-unrelated

You are forgetting about the kids growing up and realizing their workplace and homes and public places they frequent don't have the super necessary bulletproof safety sheds.

This idea that we should turn schools into fortresses always ignores the side effect that you are telling children they aren't safe unless there are draconian and in some cases ridiculous security measures in place to prevent or mitigate events that odds are would never have happened at their school in the first place.

These kids are going to be afraid to exist in the real world.

Atralis t1_jbic0if wrote on March 9, 2023 at 6:28 AM

Reply to Japan's H3 rocket self-destructs after launch by Party-Ring445

Is it too soon to make a joke about Kamikazes in WW2?

Atralis t1_j9w65w3 wrote on February 25, 2023 at 12:06 AM

Reply to comment by CrysisCamaro in Suspect arrested in 2001 killing of a pregnant soldier at a former U.S. Army base in Germany by StevenSanders90210

I have to hope this guy wasn't an NCO but....

In my MOS when I was in the most common age that people made E5 was 21 because our promotion points were so low (350) that basically anyone that went to the board got promoted and you could go to the board at 3 years time in service.

We had a high speed guy get promoted while we were deployed that couldn't drink with us when we got back because he was 20.

Atralis t1_j9bjdpv wrote on February 20, 2023 at 6:45 PM

Reply to Union City neighbor shoots man he witnessed stabbing woman by B1Baker

Thank you Union City Neighbor.

Atralis t1_j6p0yd3 wrote on January 31, 2023 at 9:53 PM

Reply to comment by Uumm_wat in Iranian Couple Sentenced To 21 Years For Dancing In Support Of Protests by inAbigworld

I hate this thing where people hedge their criticism of Iran or some other awful place by also criticizing the west.

It's like someone reading about people starving half the world away and saying "starving there, too much unhealthy fast food making people overweight here. Wow nutrition really is a huge problem everywhere huh."

Atralis t1_j348zk8 wrote on January 5, 2023 at 11:01 PM

Reply to Parents Seek Answers After Gun Found in Waxahachie, TX School Bathroom by cdbaca

It was clearly a severely constipated man who can only poop when he's scared and is only afraid of death so he brings a gun with him so he scare the shit out of himself and then afterwards he forgot the gun.

Occam's razor.

Atralis t1_isyau24 wrote on October 19, 2022 at 4:16 PM

Reply to U.S. Astronaut James McDivitt, commander of Apollo 9, dies at age 93 by latchkey_adult

It's sad to me that the youngest person that went to the moon is 87. I get that we've made huge progress in other scientific endeavors but I don't think anyone on the last apollo mission 50 years ago imagined that in the next half century they no one would even come close to getting as far from the earth as they did.