Well that calls for thorough inquiry. She really should be aware how it makes her look like, so I hope if you do decide to ask more about in the future she will indulge your curiosity. The problem assuming she has told you truth then the question why was she engaged? There is certainly a reason for that some kind of emotional problem that only made her reconsider things when she was engaged.

Otherwise can't tell anything more, because we lack information.

So, first talk to your girlfriend. The fact that you have talked to us first is worrying. I don't mean argue with her, but tell her your insecuirities and the reason you have them.

With that said she has done nothing to warrant suspicion. Yes she has stayed longer then she has initially told you, I have done that many times with my friends. Thing is she didn't have any appointment to meet with, you didn't even ask her when will she come back. If you do make plans and they get compromised because of Jyke, then you can be upset.

>she should be free to do whatever she likes. But this seems more of a date than just a meetup.

No, if she wants to be in relationship she isn't free to do whatever she likes. However this wasn't exactly a date, 2 hours of talking and drinking isn't necessarily a date. If she is contacting him constantly or spending with him similar amount of time as with you, then will be time to be concerned. The same with your plans, if you can't make proper plans to do things with her, because she is doing things with him so often, then you can be worried. Nothing of what I have mentioned is present here from what I see in your post.

You seem to be aware that there are things that should be reserved only for your partner. These however do include the kind of physical intimacy you practise with your "friend". Don't let her kiss you in any shape or form, don't let her sleep with her arms around you. Also what kind of excuse is "she did is jump into my arms so like obviously I didn’t want her to fall so I caught her" . You enable this behaviour, ok this happened once, that's fine, you should scold her and tell to not do this kind of things. In fact that goes for every behaviour that pushes the line.

You are very disrespectful towards your gilrfriend by not establishing boundaries with your friend and enforcing them.

Apart from staying away from her? Try to find and contact her boyfriend, I mean she has been leading you on for 4 weeks I think it would understandable.

You put consistent effort on your side so that you won't have to complain for lack of foreplay and whatnot. If they refuse to pull their own weight even then and you need more then then there is likely no other choice but to leave. You might just be sexually incompatible.

You are right to want to proceed slowly. Should you plan divorce you should contact lawyer asap. Another thing is I imagine your wife will make attempts to sweet talk you back. Btw was it her that you finally got this information from? I ask not just to pry, but because I want to know if it's a confirmed thing.

At least you don't have children, this would be nightmare. Have you thought what are you going to do?

How did you find out about it? Also yes, if I calculate properly you are together since you were 13. Now on one hand it's hard to imagine such relationship lasting without one side getting interested in "exploration". However she didn't break up with you to explote neither did she tell you afterwards. Therefore yes if she lied and hid this there is probably more dead bodies in the closet. This is also why how much time has passed doesn't change anything, cause you can't really trust her now, can you?