PygmeePony
PygmeePony t1_jdun3l3 wrote
He also talked to his one night stand and almost got impeached.
PygmeePony t1_jdcrsp7 wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in TIFU By snooping through my wife's phone by [deleted]
That's a peculiar way to say you hate your kids.
PygmeePony t1_ja7i4vh wrote
Reply to Statistically there are by crispilly
This joke is going to age like milk.
PygmeePony t1_j9t0qjj wrote
People'd rather have cancer.
PygmeePony t1_j9g0zy2 wrote
Reply to Sugar is the only word in the english language where a singular "S" makes a "SH" sound. by WirrkopfP
I've had the displeasure of seeing this joke being reposted all the time.
PygmeePony OP t1_j69j9p4 wrote
Reply to comment by speculatrix in You can't properly weigh your body parts without cutting them off by PygmeePony
You can estimate it, that's true. But if you would lay your hand on a scale, I believe you would not get an accurate result because the hand is still supported by your wrist.
Submitted by PygmeePony t3_10njl07 in Showerthoughts
PygmeePony t1_j5bjp12 wrote
Reply to As a doctor I often get asked why I use that rubber hammer to tap patient's knees. by Firegoat1
Weird flex.
PygmeePony t1_j2flmsh wrote
Reply to TIL there are people in France who have actually done time in jail for stealing garden gnomes in the name of The Garden Gnome Liberation Front by Koivosto
It's actually the Garden Gnome Liberation Movement. Don't worry, it's a common misgnomer.
PygmeePony t1_j2e6p5a wrote
Not the bottoms.
PygmeePony t1_j24wudi wrote
She's being really anal about it.
PygmeePony t1_j199r33 wrote
Reply to comment by Zombata in TIFU by changing all of my daughter's contacts in her phone by GreenEggPage
A retirement home? I'd just drop him off under the nearest bridge.
PygmeePony t1_ixr539c wrote
Reply to These ducks at my local bubble tea shop by cmnemeth
That's ducked up.
PygmeePony t1_ixefjad wrote
This joke left me shaken, not stirred.
PygmeePony t1_iuhg29z wrote
Reply to How do you measure the quality of a dadjoke? by venzann
Groanometer
PygmeePony t1_iuefad5 wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in I met a nice guy online. He says he's from South Korea. by StrangerWithACheese
He left many women breathless.
PygmeePony t1_ityvvlh wrote
One day you won't have to go back to your job anymore?
PygmeePony t1_it3cyoz wrote
Monsters make women scream. Yours just makes them laugh.
PygmeePony t1_je5b3yp wrote
Reply to What do you call a guy with a knife sticking out of him? by jflipside
I would probably help him but you do you.