Thisisthatguy99

Thisisthatguy99 t1_jb8nbvg wrote

Glad to hear the human trafficking ones are mostly shut down, and hopefully any that are left will be shut down too.

Back in 2005, there were a lot of them in Pyeongtaek, and though the military warned us about them, they weren’t doing anything to shut them down. Only way the girls could get out where to find someone willing to buy their passport back from the bar owner. Actually had a coworker do that with a Russian juicie.

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_jb24583 wrote

When I was stationed in South Korea, we called them Juice bars.

Basically, a female hostess/waitress will sit down and have a conversation with you as long as she has a drink in front of her (in Korea the women were only allowed to have non-alcoholic drinks). The women’s drinks are way over priced, and depending on how much she likes talking to you is shown by how fast she will drink the drink. But once you stop buying drinks for her, and her last drink is empty, she moves on to the next guy.

Because of the job, these women are talented at making the men they talk to feel wanted and like they are available to meet up outside of the bar… usually they aren’t. But they make money based how how many drinks the guy buys so they learn the skills to keep a lonely guy there, or get him coming back again and again.

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_jad8cei wrote

Ok, I’m done with this conversation. Go ahead and hurt your family even more, then you have, instead of doing the right thing for once. You don’t want to listen to reason. You just want to do what you want AGAIN. Proving AGAIN how selfish you are. You’ve already admitted that you will never be able to provide mentally/emotionally the way mom can. You are looking strictly at financial… what you can spend and where that money can afford to have you live… but money can be given away… and you can still provide a decent life for your daughter from half way across the world.

I get where your coming from, as a single father. But if I knew there was someone who could give my son a better mental/emotional life while I paid in the background… I would do it because its what’s best for him, and that’s what matters most. But with my situation, there is no one else, just me and him.

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_jad5og7 wrote

You believe that because you are hurt and scared of losing your daughter, so your emotions are affecting rational thought, and you are lying to yourself and everyone here. The difference is we can see it cause we are on the outside with no emotional connection.

Take your daughter, let your daughter move on and have a better life with her mom…. It has no affect on everyone else here so we can let logic guide us. You already hurt and will be losing the people you love, so you can’t think clearly and are just telling yourself what you want to hear to try and rationalize your feelings.

You’ve proven who you are as a human. Therapy or not, that’s who you are. The best thing for your daughter is to let her stay with her mother who you already admit gives her better emotional care, something she’ll need as her family is broken apart because of your actions.

The best you can hope for is to offer the mom whatever financial support she seems fair if she is willing to stay local so you can stay close to your daughter. I’m talking over and above alimony and child support. And you just accept that as penance and be thankful if she accepts.

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_jad2vlg wrote

No one will believe you because you have already proven what kind of person you are.

You were selfish when you cheated on your wife.

You are being selfish now by wanting to take your daughter away from your wife (if your wife leaves and your daughter stays with you, your wife won’t be able to see her, meaning that you are hurting her YET AGAIN.)

And you WILL (I say this without question and with 200% certainty) be selfish again with your daughter. When something comes up and you have to choose between what you want and your daughter you will choose what you want. You can say I’m wrong all you want, but your actions have already proven me right. Your cheating wasn’t just hurting your wife, but hurting your daughter to by ruining your marriage.

Be the decent human being for once in your life and let them both go, and pay them a high amount for alimony and child support… enough that they can live comfortably… since you needed to prove to everyone how much you make… we know you can afford to do so if you’re not being selfish.

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_jad06bo wrote

You are forgetting the alimony and child support you will be paying. Upwards of 60% of your 200k income. That leaves mom and daughter $120k a year… plenty to live on.

If you continue to be selfish.. you will fight that. But if you want to do whats right for them, and truly feel guilty for your actions, you won’t.

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_jaczkxx wrote

You’ve already proved your selfishness twice. Any you really think the best thing is for your daughter to be with you? You will be selfish again, but instead of hurting your (soon to be ex) wife, you will be hurting your daughter. Let your wife take your daughter, and give her all the love and care she does. The best thing you can do for everyone right now is to get some therapy for yourself. After the therapy helps you, you can start to work on your relationship with your daughter.

Since you needed to point out your $200k job, let me point something out. In most places in the US, a divorcing mother with child custody can get upwards of 60% of your income. So you will be cutting that income down to closer to 60k…. And if you love your daughter, and feel bad for your actions against your wife…. You won’t fight this

Edit: spelling

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Thisisthatguy99 t1_ja1pn14 wrote

My ex had a cat that got an eye infection. To treat her, we had to burrito her in a towel and give her eye drops twice a day for two weeks. After the first day, the cat would hide from us and it was a chore to chase her around to catch her.. after it was done it took about 3 days before she was back to the lovey little fur ball she had been before

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