"Stinkin' to hiiiiiigh heaven!" Loudon Wainwright's biggest hit.

Open a cold one's crack?

And after you went to Hell and back to create it.

A Black guy is talking to God.

"O God, please tell me--why'd you make my skin so dark?"

God answers, "To protect you from the intense heat of the African sun, my child."

"OK, so, tell me this--why'd you give me this tight, curly hair?"

"So that, when you are hunting in the jungle, you won't get caught in tree branches, my child."

"That's cool. But now, tell me this--why'd you give me such long legs?"

"So that you could run across the savannah, hunting antelope for days without tiring, my child."

"Fine, fine. But just one more thing. God--why the fuck did you put me in Chicago?"

They're both more enjoyable when they're saucy.