I'm an avid moviegoer, but I love libraries more than most other places on the planet, so this was a welcome surprise for me.

This isn't Oniony. This is wholesome.

How is this Oniony?

The fact that he served seven years in prison for an armed robbery and then refused to concede after losing his race by a two-to-one margin meand this isn't surprising.

Your mom said that every time she saw your grades in school.

How are clothes sexual? Why don't you go back to the hick town, dead-end job, bratty kids, mangy dog, cigarette-smoking wife beater of a husband you have waiting for you off the computer in the corner of your trailer?

Aside from it being a clear violation of privacy laws and policy and unsanitary for the dozens of minors who sit in there every day, it's against basic workplace policies everywhere in almost any sense. If I were a teacher and typed in, "Viagra," on my computer, I'd get fired. This is that times a 1,000.

She made adult videos in a classroom. How can you feel sorry for her?

There is a mandatory minimum of 85 percent in federal courts.

It makes sense, since it was water from a fire hose at the University of Tehran.