la_peregrine

la_peregrine t1_j9wh0nt wrote

No theblast part is not.unnecessary.

Yes not everyone can help every time. But there are also people who never help.

So don't forget that there are people who never help anyone. They are not worth of your help.

When I was I college, we helped each other move things. Now people moved at different times and not everyone could help everyone else. But if you never helped people move, when it was your turn to move, you got no help.

Remember those who help you (even if they help you by helping your friends so your friends can help you) and also remember those who never help.

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la_peregrine t1_j9wb014 wrote

Wtf has that to do with it..never forget doesn't mean always bend over backwards.

I'll never forget the library lady who bought me a cheap plane ticket so I can do a summer REU thing at a prestigious institution when I had 5 dollars in my bank account. I know that changed things for me. If she had called asking for help when my SO was in the hospital, it is unlikely I'd have been able to help. Tbh that is not when I could help other s bit when I needed even more help.

But other times? If she wanted help with figuring things out, she could always call me and I'd listen and say. Yup let me teach you this or can't right now but I can look at it tonight or this weekend and get back to you tomorrow or on Monday, if that works for you.

(Past tense because she sadly passed away)

But even going further, it doesn't have to be big spoons. It can be small ones. Today I have extra time to help a colleague. Yeah I could goof around but being aware of people who've helped me and not forgetting them means that instead I will look for a colleague who might need a bit of help.

This is what it means..sometimes use upa spoon you'd use on yourself to help someone. How many spoons and how often depends on circumstances.

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la_peregrine t1_j00tk9a wrote

You don't even know what questions to ask is an excuse. Try reading the documents and ask everything you do not understand. Call up your loan officer and ask questions on their documents. If your loan officer minds find a better one. Mine didn't know the answer to one question. So he said he'd ask someone more involved with that part and I had an answer in a day. In the title office you can sit and read every page and ask questions. Would they grump, sure. Did I give a shit? Nope. Idgaf that it was the hottest market in the country and they had many deals. They didn't send me the documents early so both my husband and I sat there reading and asking. When the person had to step away, we asked for post it's and put the questions there.

It's never going to be someone else's jobs to make sure you know wtf is happening. Even in a doctor's office, the onus is on you to ask questions.

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