Seriously cool fact.

Thank you, all of you, for sharing here. I know —exactly—how hard this was to do. Don’t EVER doubt that you are courageous—and strong-willed. After all, you’re still here. You had the guts to speak up.

Narcissists are one of the world’s evils. I wish you better days. [I use “her” in the following generically. I have no idea if your SO was male or female.] And, therapy! Because it’s important to, 1st, identify all the way a narcissist mind-f*ked you; “manipulated” is rarely a strong enough word to describe the experience. Then, 2nd, you need to absorb and accept that the narcissist abused you based on HER needs. Not on your actions, or your personality, or your “shortcomings,” but on her ego’s needs. You were just another object to help her meet her needs; her criticism was never about you—gaslighting or abusing you was done to make her feel good/safe/superior/etc. In other words, narcissists lie. Therapy helps you to accept and KNOW that the narcissist’s statements about you were lies, the sole purpose of which was to feed the vast, empty, neediness of the narcissist. I think I belabored that enough to pound home the point. Memorize it, repeat it when your confidence wavers. It will help!

I believe C-PTSD isn’t so much hard to spot, it’s that almost no one in the psychoanalysis community is looking for it. Heck, they’re still debating if it’s actually a separate thing; the argument is that it’s [just] childhood trauma + PTSD. As such, I am thrilled that Reddit has a sub-community for it. Initial information—hearing it exists—is as important as Education at this point, I think.

The community is still debating whether C-PTSD is a separate thing, or if it should be classified as, example “childhood trauma + PTSD.”

A therapist explained C-PTSD to me this way: “Soldiers back from Iraq are here (hand held at knee height); C-PTSD, here ( hand held even with eyes).”

As others have, let me assure you, you sure sound like you have ptsd. I’m not a professional, I wouldn’t attempt to diagnose—but I have my share of t-shirts, mugs, etc., so…

It is common among people with ptsd to think “compared to others, I didn’t have it so bad.” Think of damage in terms of bands—white, yellow, orange, red, purple. Once you’re inside that ptsd band, there’s no sliding scale. Everyone in the band is Orange. Period.

Religion: The “God’s holy love” schtick is a smoke-screen for some of the most horrible things done to humans. Mormonism can be mild—or it can attempt to control your every thought and action, which of course is grotesque abuse.

Group therapy, emdr therapy—you can see demos, explanations on youtube, check them out—can be quite helpful. I wish you and your family better days.

My heart can’t stand it! It’s both breaking and filled with joy. Give Rosie a snuggle from me?