where do you hear people insisting others dump their friends who are going through a hard time? i wouldnt ever consider a friend whose struggling to be someone whos no longer serving me. i think those are two very different things.

I hear you. Being a good person involves lots of healthy boundaries. Otherwise there is an inevitable burnout. Boundaries with love is so important. No one can always be there for others, nor should they be even if they could. Sometimes people have to learn stuff the hard way even if we want to help. Caring and compassion can become codependency very quickly if it doesn’t stay within healthy lines. It’s our own responsibility to make sure we protect ourselves from overextension.

If being a good person is making you bitter, you might want to look at what “good” means to you. It isn’t something that should leave you bitter and drained. If it is, there’s motives and/or expectations there that aren’t truly good. That’s on you to look at and be honest with yourself about.

What do you mean?

That type of goodness is usually actually transactional on the part of the “empath”. This happens when empathy and codependency get confused.

That's your opinion :) sorry to hear it

I have cancer. I am going to feel sorry for myself and focus on negativity the entire time I am in treatment until I die. 😞

I have cancer. I now understand we are all here for a limited time, and my diagnosis has allowed me to see life and my place in the world differently. For the first time, I am learning not to be afraid. I have the chance to put love into the world around me while I am still here and this makes the remaining part of life beautiful to me. 😀