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arimadx t1_ivfl6ok wrote

I don't know man, myself kinda sucks lmao

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FreeMyMen t1_ivh99r2 wrote

You are just a living, breathing being, you just have a lot of negative thoughts and mindset making you see yourself as something else.

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thecordialsun t1_ivhp27v wrote

Yeah, speaking for myself: autistic, pathological liar, and a coward. I'm lame

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whitelighthurts t1_iviajgf wrote

Work on it man. I ran to drugs and really fucked myself up. But I think if I would have addressed my fear and WHY I lied and was so afraid.

Do you never feel like the real you is quite right? Do the lies form a mask?

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j1j2h1h2 t1_ivi5qrm wrote

You can’t be a coward and have autism because that’s impossible. Every day, you live in a neurotypical world where so much doesn’t make sense or feels unnatural to you. That takes guts — that’s bold. Remember that the next time you feel like you’re lame. This would be the equivalent of somebody dropping me in the middle of Germany (I don’t speak German) in the year 2075. You’re amazing, so please remember that. But also, stop lying. It’s bad for your soul. You’re already aware of this, though, so you’re off to a good start.

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Littleman88 t1_ivjmpgr wrote

It's bold to make the first step and gain some ground. Then you get scared you'll lose it all by opening your mouth and saying something insensitive or dumb.

Yeah, for people where ever step forward is a struggle, it makes sense they'd be terrified of doing anything that would instantly take them back to the starting line. It's why confidence is so hard for some people, especially people that have never felt like "winners."

We've all presumably played chutes and ladders? Every roll feels like it could land us on that one space with the really long chute, and we can't see any ladders. Brave to roll again, sure, but the chute is always there.

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j1j2h1h2 t1_ivkryxq wrote

This is very well said — it sounds like you speak from experience. One of my children is on the spectrum and while I can't (and shouldn't) even attempt to speak for him, I think he would find your words and this example to be very relatable. And in the same way he sometimes struggles to have compassion for others, he also deserves that same level of understanding. If not more.

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thecaninfrance t1_ivevpiw wrote

How am I not myself?

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rish_talking t1_iveyxl8 wrote

Well, think of it like. Let's say you want to drive a car, who are you? A driver.... And just like that You are a son, a daughter, a friend, a lover, a cook, someone hungry, ... Sometimes prey but mostly a predator......A REDDITOR... An employee, a business owner, a police man. Etc etc

In Gist.... We wear identities to function in this world like clothes jumping from one identity to another.

What happens when you are not wearing any! Completely naked. Who are you? No one!

Every identity makes its own noise in the head. You would never heard the silence.

Every identity has its own weight on our breathe. You would have never taken a more free breathe.

Just relax every muscle you can. Let the identities dissolve and underneath it's you.

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tychus-findlay t1_ivhlgfv wrote

I took a different meaning on this. If anyone battles with depression, anxiety, things like that, it's like a black cloud over your true self. In those times, you just want to feel normal, but you don't, and you hate it. You don't hate yourself, you just hate that you don't feel like what you consider the best version of yourself.

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rish_talking t1_ivindsw wrote

Okay! I want to add more it but i do not want to sound arrogant.

Anxiety and depression look like they have their own identity that is persistent. I looked it like that for years myself.

Eventually, i started to see them differently.

Adding on what I said before. We wear identities like clothes based on what is needed in the moment. What if I am not able to? 1) Either I do not have the energy to create an identity (that looks like depression) 2) I do not know what identity to create (instant panic, that looks like anxiety)

Different reasons, but result is the same. Unable to function to our potential.

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universalrifle t1_ivfn3mw wrote

I will always want to be the driver and make sure everyone is having the ride of their life!

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rish_talking t1_ivfnshf wrote

Even when you are not driving?

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universalrifle t1_ivfnx82 wrote

Yes. I could drive in my sleep

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rish_talking t1_ivfo80j wrote

Are you driving right now?

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universalrifle t1_ivfo9ny wrote

Most definitely

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Cylon_Skin_Job_2_10 t1_ivfujpw wrote

The part of us that we fear having uncovered and exposed to others, so we shame and deny it out of existence? The part that truly wants this, but not that, but had been told what it “should” want instead and so we try to uphold that standard. For some people, that part of themselves is so deeply pushed down and ignored that they forgot it exists, and then they wonder why it is so hard to engage with life, and hate themselves for not being able to do what they “should be” doing, and it’s like, this is someone else’s life you are trying to live, that’s why.

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Alone_Asparagus7651 t1_ivh2bdf wrote

You ARE yourself. People try to pass the blame to other things, but essentially you are your habits. You prove who you are by what you do. If a person says they love you, but beat you up every time they see you do you really think they love you? No of course not, we all know this. The same applies to ourselves. We prove who we are by our actions.

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parakeet2002 t1_ivftjbx wrote

You know who you are because you know who you aren't. By subtracting who aren't from you are, you can know youself

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SpiffySleet t1_ivex7ii wrote

Naaaaaaah I’m pretty sure I just fucking hate myself but thanks

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Due_Avocado_788 t1_ivgmvaf wrote

I like this a lot.

Ignore the people that have to shit on every post btw

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Relxnce t1_ivgr2rj wrote

Yeah this resonates with me. I’ve been seeing my therapist lately and he described me as wearing a “mask” constantly.

When I’m around my family, friends, coworkers and I don’t feel like I can be myself. Like I’m being stifled.

It made so much sense. I’m living my life not truly expressing myself and almost hiding. They say that once I come to terms with this and start being my true self I’ll feel a weight lift and will be a lot happier. Easier said than done but I’m working on it

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beertoth t1_ivgnyzp wrote

Why do you like it? I don’t quite understand it, but I want to because it looks cool.

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Due_Avocado_788 t1_ivgon64 wrote

Just my interpretation but imagine your "true self" as the person that you want to be. Maybe you have a goal to do 100 push ups. Your true self would be someone that can do 100 push ups, and currently you aren't that person.

Just a crude way to explain it, for me, I've been a bit miserable for a while, and I blame my job and a lot of other things I have to do every day.. it sort of manifested in minor self-hate... but seeing this reminded me that I'm not the problem. It's that I'm not actually being the person I'm "supposed" to be, aka my true self.

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beertoth t1_ivgrrxh wrote

That’s an interesting interpretation. So it’s not that you hate who you are or yourself, but that you’re not acting how you want to. I suppose I agree with that interpretation somewhat. Although it still doesn’t ring for me, I’m happy to hear it resonated with you!

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froginbog t1_ivh9zxs wrote

It makes a lot of sense. You see yourself one way, and not making it a reality is frustrating. Don’t lose the picture of yourself in your mind.

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P0ukram t1_iveyn4e wrote

"What ? Why would I let go of Katara ? I... I love her !"

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EthosPathosLegos t1_ivg1qkj wrote

I hate that when im myself people don't like me as much as other people being themselves, because apparently other people's selves are better than my self. So i am now myself when im alone, which creates toxic reinforced feedback loops from isolation, and whatever i think will get the best results when im with others. I tried being myself for years and got nothing but trouble from it. Maybe i am in a toxic area and people really do just suck, but we dont always get a choice where we live and I don't want to constantly be fighting with people over stupid shit that comes with "being yourself". Because at the end of the day, our selves are not perfect, they are selfish IDs.

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nezukotanjiro150 t1_ivg50qe wrote

What if your real self is a complete asshole ?

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BarryBro t1_ivf7863 wrote

Hmm I don't know about that.

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AyyP302 t1_ivfghso wrote

Thank you, I needed to see this.

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MellifluousSussura t1_ivhbv46 wrote

Mm. No. I’m pretty sure every bad decision I’ve made was made by me. No need to try to excuse my own bullshit thanks

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Torii_Explores t1_iviaqvm wrote

I feel like depression has robbed a portion of my identify lately. I just want myself and my happiness back. This resonates with me. Thank you.

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CatWhenSlippery t1_ivfmgcq wrote

I have this problem. So, how do I fix it?

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gameartist3d t1_ivft4rj wrote

Quit trying to people please and express yourself even if you're receiving negativity

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Littleman88 t1_ivjnb03 wrote

A fine sentiment, but people hating you doesn't feed the ego unless you're a narcissist and spin the beratement as proof they're insecure and can't match up to your awesomeness.

I'm all for motivating people, but naive, empty headed platonic motivations can do more harm lasting than good.

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gameartist3d t1_ivrsk27 wrote

It's not about using negativity, it's expressing yourself regardless if you receive negativity. Big difference. You have to be true to yourself in every situation or you'll slowly lose the trust of people around you and most importantly yourself.

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Littleman88 t1_ivjnz0o wrote

Fake it 'til you make it? Or in other words, become the self you want to be.

Honestly, you'll love your happiest and/or most successful self most. A lot of people will interpret the post to mean "stop giving a shit what others think!" which, heh, we're herd animals and we live in a society. Denying a fundamental human experience isn't going to work. It just breaks us.

Unless you already have people you deeply respect that you know appreciate you and you feel your emotional needs met, not giving a shit about how other people think about you is a fine way to not give a shit about other people period, though it does ironically help with tolerating rejection when you get into social things like the dating game.

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Dr_Nastee t1_ivg5j7t wrote

Ramin Nazer is an awesome comic and artist. Love his art style.

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ansz t1_ivg003a wrote

I feel this with every fiber of my current being.

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SlagChops t1_ivg3crg wrote

Myself is the only person on this planet I hate.

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trailblazery t1_ivg8ncc wrote

I think about this often. What if my true self is not compatible with the current world?

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Swick01 t1_ivgsn5z wrote

This was helpful, thanks

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Neither_Ad_3221 t1_ivhie2j wrote

What if you never had a chance to figure out who you are?

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xMrjamjam t1_ivhuzex wrote

100% accurate, never realised it until now.

Thank you op, i got a lot of work to do

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Creebjeez t1_ivi05lv wrote

You sure about that, bucko?

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Nkechinyerembi t1_ivfzx3b wrote

I mean yeah but with life basically demanding you can't be yourself then like.... Okay?

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Seventh_Planet t1_ivg6i6a wrote

I don't hate it. It can actually be quite relaxing. But I wouldn't want it all the time.

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Nevermemory t1_ivgh6h2 wrote

How exhausting it is to wear the mask day in and day out. How exhilarating it would be to one day not need to wear the mask, to show our true self. Wouldn't that be the day 😥

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Bernto_ t1_ivgzick wrote

You hate not being the version of yourself you want to be*

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Lifeiscleanair t1_ivgzylx wrote

There is no self. Where are you located?

If you look more closely you will find that it is an illusion

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coyote-1 t1_ivimyh3 wrote

This is the dilemma of every alcoholic. They hate not being themselves, and getting drunk removes the inhibitions and allows them to be themselves. How could they not want the bottle?

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Kindly-Palpitation97 t1_ivin8ib wrote

You hate yourself because you know people will hate you for being you. Doing the opposite makes you feel like a narcissist (again hating yourself for it). It's a sad cycle

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Double-Driver-3535 t1_iviq35u wrote

Among all the creatures on Earth, human being is definitely superior.
Writing a few lines or words about myself to introduce, I feel myself to
be tiny part of this entire world that is filled with the human beings
around. I am a human. I myself am humble, kind, caring and courageous. I
am most respected, loved and responsible human being. Though, it is
quite hard to write about yourself yet I have tried myself best to
express all about myself.

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DoubleSly t1_ivjda3s wrote

Don’t come here often but why does everyone hate on every post hahah. This is a good message. Have the courage to break free from what others expect of you and be truly you.

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DEATHEATER-123 t1_ivjggyc wrote

I still would say it's myself that i hate

Yet I like myself the way i am......I can be better still

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IndependentDot7481 t1_ivjhqlj wrote

I feel the most myself when I'm drunk you guys, and other people don't like it. I get really angry but in honesty it's just the things I wish I would say sober. You get to know the real you when you're drunk. The alcohol cancels that part of your brain which you suppress normally.

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kaowser t1_ivh4hhb wrote

hate that i'm not somebody else.

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resfan t1_ivh88ep wrote

Yeah, but, society.

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