My suggestion is to follow her lead when it comes to cleaning, but also go at your own pace. You say she likes to clean things as soon as their dirty so you can help here by putting used dishes away, put used clothes in the laundry basket and properly sorted, inverted, whatever.

There's an easy cleaning mantra that will help you:

"Don't put it down; put it away."

If you see your wife cleaning something that's a bigger task offer to help or just start helping. How you did things in the past is not how you will do things in your new family. Your wife might relax over time or she might pretend she is while feeling an underlying feeling of stress that the house isn't more clean.

Just be helpful and do your best. Cleaning is a great time to catch up on podcasts or listen to a book on tape. The Lord of the Rings read by Andy Serkis are really enjoyable.