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DontXpectCompnsation t1_je01ugm wrote

Dating apps are horrible, especially in Maine.

Its advice I'm sure you've heard a million time but just keep doing what you're already doing. Make an effort to hang out with people who share the same interests as you, don't make the primary goal to meet someone, just enjoy yourself with people you like hanging with.

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[deleted] OP t1_je0ddmg wrote

Thank you and yeah I've used dating apps for years and for some reason in Maine. Its very rough, I've gotten more matches outside the state of Maine than in the state of Maine for some reason. Yes, I have definitely heard the same thing a million times but I haven't really tried any of the suggestions yet, Video Games is my number 1 hobby. So, I normally stay home and play with my friends. Which makes it hard to meet people.

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DontXpectCompnsation t1_je10imm wrote

This is relatable and unfortunately there aren't any gaming cafes in Maine that I know of. Keep games as the #1 but start branching out real slowly. Are you a big nerd? Theres a huge LARP group called Mystwood that meets regularly and they are some amazing people. It'll get you out in a nature and definitely meet some people.

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Coffee-FlavoredSweat t1_je1gw4w wrote

Does the quality of people on the apps change depending on which app you use?

A decade ago I knew a girl who used to look for guys on POF and all she ever found were total losers.

I was pretty serious about finding a real relationship, so between Match and eHarmony, I paid for a year subscription to eHarmony. Ended up meeting the person I married within the first 2 months.

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MrFittsworth t1_je2i0gk wrote

I met my fiance on tinder. Dating apps aren't that bad if you are mildly socially aware and can engage in anything more than small talk with a stranger

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DontXpectCompnsation t1_je53iov wrote

I met my wife of tinder lol. But I don't look back on the swiping with any kind of fondness. I actually had already stopped swiping to preserve my mental health and my now wife messaged me out of the blue after I swiped on her long before she did me.

When it goes well its nice to look back and say its not too bad but I had so many weird, uncomfortable situations before I met my wife. I had a girl try to aggressively to set me up with gay friend because I had a "gay vibe" Or another girl who pretty much opened with a story of her sexual assault. Its out there.

Not to mention my wife and I matched during the pandemic which what when everyone, even "normal" people were on Tinder.

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MrFittsworth t1_je55iih wrote

I had a lot of really positive experiences on tinder. I got my dog through a connection where we remained friends. I got a new car because a girl I was seeing at the time had a sibling selling hers cheap. I've wound up in really inexpensive apartments due to parters, and like I said, my fiance.

Tinder is like most things, you get back what you give. Sure there were some awkward days, but typically that happens even at work or just existing anyway. It's not nearly as bad as it seems at face value imo.

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eb0livia t1_je6oo46 wrote

This is true for anywhere you meet people, some people are just weird/creepy. when you’re actively going on more dates and only are meeting other people looking for dates statistically speaking, it’s going to happen more frequently. Just make sure you’re using the app like anything else safely, not inviting anyone to your house, meeting anyone in private, or catching a ride with anyone.

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eb0livia t1_je2f0yb wrote

I met my partner of 3.5 years on tinder 🤷‍♀️ to each their own

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Jim_stugots t1_je4kqky wrote

Married to a nice women I met on tinder as well. You just gotta keep trying!

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curtludwig t1_je216lr wrote

>Its advice I'm sure you've heard a million time but just keep doing what you're already doing.

Doing what you've been doing will keep providing the results you've been getting. If those aren't what you want then you need to try something else...

Edit: Perhaps you meant "keep being who you are" or to put it another way "To thine own self be true". So don't go out and pretend you are something you aren't.

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