SuumCuique1011 t1_j1x06ez wrote on December 28, 2022 at 12:49 AM

The first part will be true. After a divorce, the second part won't necessarily be true.

It's much easier to blame any and all difficulties with the child on the dead parent.

The more you know 🌠

BrewtusMaximus1 t1_j1xnhja wrote on December 28, 2022 at 3:51 AM

My ex wife didn’t appreciate everything I did house and kid wise until we divorced - and she then didn’t fully appreciate it until she moved with the kids an hour away and I went from having them half time to every other weekend.

Yourfaceis-23 OP t1_j1x0npy wrote on December 28, 2022 at 12:53 AM

My ex thanks me often for all I do for our kids. My present boyfriend who’s kids live with us, not so much.

SuumCuique1011 t1_j1x44yk wrote on December 28, 2022 at 1:19 AM

That sucks and I'm sorry to hear that.

Part of the reason I don't want to start dating again is because our dynamic works for now and I don't feel the need to date. She's off doing her thing. I want to spend as much time as possible with my kid. He might get more angsty and hormonal at some point, but I want to at least build that solid base of trust and communication so that he can come to me to talk if he needs to.

It sounds like your ex isn't a total POS. I don't know your situation, but I would hope you guys can work together to keep that ball rolling.

I may be totally out of line here, but if you're already living with your new bf and his kids, you've got to have a mutual partnership and understanding with him and his kids.

You're a team living in the same household. Keeping a household running has to be a team effort, imho.

I wish you the best of luck.

Jetztinberlin t1_j1z5g1w wrote on December 28, 2022 at 2:10 PM

Then you have a boyfriend problem. I'm sorry. Have you discussed this with him?

Yourfaceis-23 OP t1_j1z5uzd wrote on December 28, 2022 at 2:14 PM

I have

Jetztinberlin t1_j1z6aq2 wrote on December 28, 2022 at 2:17 PM

If you've discussed it openly and plainly, and he understands you feel underappreciated and hasn't changed as a result, then... he's telling you making you feel appreciated isn't important to him. As you can see from the comments here, it is very possible for partners to show appreciation to each other. So you have a choice: maybe the lack of appreciation is a flaw in your relationship you can live with because other positive aspects balance it out, and maybe it's not.