Submitted by AliciaWrites t3_11n2zms in WritingPrompts
FyeNite t1_jcbie3z wrote
Reply to comment by wordsonthewind in [TT] Theme Thursday - Journalism by AliciaWrites
Hey words!
I always enjoy the obscure stories you come up with for this feature, words. Like, I can think of a hundred ways of taking this prompt, and of course, the one you go for is super thoughtful and subtle. Where the twist is something easily missed.
I also quite liked the contrast between the two different Tigos here. I liked the two sides we got.
Very well done!
I do just have a few bits and bobs for you,
> "If you have any complaints about the service here, you should take them up with the management," I said.
A small thing, but I really don't think you need the dialogue tag at the end. It's a conversation between two people, so you can do without it. And I think it'll help the flow of the line too!
> I'd been looking forward to the full piece. But now I was rapidly losing interest in anything he had to say.
This just came on a bit too quickly. Like he just sat down and bam, it's already over. Maybe a few more dialogue lines in between could help?
> He turned at the sound of my camera snapping,
Finally, if he turned at this sound, then wouldn't the photo be of his back? Or does he just turn supernaturally quickly? A small thing, really.
I hope this helps.
Good Words!
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