Submitted by TheMajesticMoose08 t3_zdakne in massachusetts
you-mistaken t1_iz4kdnp wrote
Reply to comment by bostonchef72296 in Gendered Single-Occupant Bathrooms in MA by TheMajesticMoose08
I'm not trying to be argue, but am genuinely curious, how this would make things harder for trans person. the people that for trans and gender fluid people using the bathroom they choose aren't gonna turn their backs on it because of it,, and the people who are against it are already against it. The one thing that makes me nervous about out right declaring it is wrong and being against this, is it opens the door to trans people needing to pass so subjective sincerity test to be allowed to exercise their rights. I honestly think it be safer and better for the trans community to say ok fine you say your gender fluid or a woman thats that, you know the haters are just waiting for the trans community themselves to open the door to making it ok to question if someone has alternative motivations in making a gender identity claim. I do respect your point of view for sure, and I understand how my point of view may not sit well. but I think it's safest for the trans community to stay with an unwavering position that no one is allowed to question if a person is sincere in their gender identity. I think that's far more dangerous to our rights.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz4m0zx wrote
The right wingers argument for not wanting to allow people to use the bathrooms they identify with is that any man could just say they identify as a woman and use the woman’s bathroom and assault someone. So if men start randomly identifying as women when they actually don’t feel that way, they will just be proving the right wingers right that it is dangerous to let trans women in bathrooms. (regardless of the fact that no assault took place)
It is also delegitimizes trans identity when someone “identifies” as a woman just to gain access to a space when they actually don’t feel that way. Trans people have fought really hard to be able to use the right bathroom and we still get harassed and assaulted and sometimes even killed for just existing in spaces like that, so it’s really offensive for a cis man to say “oh, well the wait for the mens is too long I’ll just identify as a woman to use the other bathroom.” Like, just no. Just use the bathroom, as a man. It’s really not a problem. You don’t need to bring an offensive, problematic identity issue with it.
I have no problem with genderfluid people, of course. If that is their genuine expression of their gender. If it only happens around bathroom usage, they can fuck right off. But still, I don’t give a single fuck if a man uses a woman’s bathroom. We are all adults here. Just don’t be a creep and we are all good. It’s a single stall in this situation so it is 0% a problem. There’s just no need to bring gender identity into it at all.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz4ma8k wrote
Also, are you trans?
you-mistaken t1_iz4ow7v wrote
I dont beileve that gender exists. I believe it's a false mass delusion.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz4v21x wrote
ok well I don’t think you get to tell people what’s “safe” regarding gender identity if you don’t believe in gender. That’s not fair.
you-mistaken t1_iz5joaz wrote
I'm not telling anyone anything just sharing my feelings is all. There are many others in the community who feel the same as me and beileve gender us a false social construction. just because I don't believe in gender existing doesn't mean I can't have any thoughts or input on it. by ur logic that would mean anyone who didn't beileve in God and religon and its effevt on society should shut up.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz5l0dv wrote
No, that’s not the same at all because religion actively causes harm to the world while someone expressing their gender does not. Yes there are problems with the way society is and the patriarchy but the simple act of gender expression does not cause harm so it is not the same thing. Don’t try to compare apples and oranges to make your point. And you are “telling” someone something. You’re speaking/writing to them. What difference does it make if you categorize it as “just an opinion.”
you-mistaken t1_iz5mo4z wrote
it is the same. some feel religon brings a lot of good and charity. your also making a strawman arguement as I never said the act of gender expression does cause harm. in fact my point since the beginning is who does it hurt? Sorry but it's an apples to apples comparison, you just don't like it. by your standards the religous people who feel it does cause harm could do what you are doing and say you need to shut up about religon and they are already allowed to speak on gender identity. Sorry us people who don't believe in the traditional views society has on gender must never fall into using religous logic. Which is we decide we are more moral and just and thus can play by different rules.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz5nm8b wrote
Dude you sound like you’re like 15 years old I can’t even understand what you’re trying to say it’s completely incomprehensible at this point. It’s like you’re trying to sound smart but you don’t actually know how the words should fit together to make real sentences.
[deleted] t1_iz5oc7u wrote
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bostonchef72296 t1_iz5owg3 wrote
The world is not black and white. One concept should not be applied to all circumstances. You’re putting words in my mouth and I won’t stand for that. You make absolutely no sense.
you-mistaken t1_iz5qit5 wrote
you are the one making black and white statement not I. you are the one declaring religion does zero good and is all evil. while it does evil it does good. you then are implying that the view gender does exist is a good and righteous view with no evil. thus one who doesn't beileve in religon can still speak on it, while the opposite isn't true.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz5radi wrote
Omg your reading comprehension dude. Where did I say ZERO GOOD and all evil? All I said was actively causes harm. I didn’t say ONLY causes harm. I’m done with this convo you clearly cannot understand nuance or anything In a grey area and just wanna argue. I don’t mean this as an insult at all but you sound like you have autism
bostonchef72296 t1_iz5pfrn wrote
I find it incredibly offensive that you’re comparing my ideals to that of religious people on the grounds that I think you shouldn’t spread around the idea that gender is a construct when transgender people are currently fighting to not get shot on a regular basis.
you-mistaken t1_iz5q7sq wrote
that's not what I'm comparing. what I'm comparing. I'm simply saying that the logic that one can not speak on something they don't beileve in is very faulty logic.
you-mistaken t1_iz5r9zv wrote
you are not following me, I agree its a construct, we agree there. I believe it's a false construct. also it's terrible people are shot for their beliefs, but religious people are also killed everyday for their beliefs. My belief that gender isn't even real does nothing to put transgenders in any danger. Now had I sad gender is a very real thing and not just in the minds of society, I believe that would be more harmful to transgenders.
you-mistaken t1_iz5oqcs wrote
I'm sorry if I'm not expressing myself well enough, is there something specific you are confused about as to what I'm saying? maybe if we just tackle 1 point at a time we can better understand eachother.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz5povn wrote
I don’t feel like continuing this conversation with someone that clearly just wants to attack my points of view
you-mistaken t1_iz5pzj7 wrote
I'm sorry, but I haven't attacked at all. you are the only one who has, and even after you attacked I didn't even attack back.
you-mistaken t1_iz5n13r wrote
I mean what you said actually sounds like a religous person,, " I'm allowed to do X cause I deem myself more righteous than y" very dangerous religous like thinking there. don't start playing by their rules. it will turn into a cycle that goes nowhere.
bostonchef72296 t1_iz5oce1 wrote
Lmao I am the farthest from religious anyone could possibly be dude. And don’t put words in my mouth. Nowhere did I say I was better than someone else and if that’s the message you’re getting you need to continue on with your high-school education and make sure you study for those finals coming up in a few weeks.
you-mistaken t1_iz5piwg wrote
I'm sorry you feel the need to insult me, I think it's a misunderstanding so will just turn the other cheek.
what I was saying there was when I express the view that I dont beileve in gender, that it's a false social delusion it's religous people who try to shut me up.
You are saying I shouldn't be allowed to express that view as well. That's all I'm pointing out.
you-mistaken t1_iz5pvjk wrote
Also you imply you are better and above others when you say ur view of good and bad is the correct view of what's good and bad. that is ur entire work around for being able to speak about religion and God even if you don't beileve in it, when you say I shouldn't be allowed to speak about gender, because I don't beileve gender exists at all.
you-mistaken t1_iz4pzjy wrote
like if gender did actually exist reasonable people would overwhelmingly agree on what defines a gender. know what I mean? Like for the most part reasonable and logical people would all have to agree the defintion of a male is.......... and defintion of female is.......... Since reasonable people don't have a anything close to a shared defintion, I think that's just more evidence gender is a false delusion. So since i dont beileve gender exists I obviously don't believe a person can transfer from one thing that doesn't exist to another thing that doesn't exist. we are all just humans. It's tough you know what I mean, cause in a way of I were to consider myself transgender, I feel I would be reinforcing the gender delusion and to a degree the gender binary delusion.
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