You not being able to access notes from previous appointments and a 12 year old making all medical decisions are two completely different things. Are you the one taking your child to the appointments? Are you allowed in the exam room? Are you speaking to his Dr about concerns? Are you speaking to your child about their concerns and if they are comfortable with a recommended treatment plan? Then you are involved in the medical decisions. Whether you feel you should have the final say or not, your child should always be a big part of the conversation. Personally, I believe my child, even at 12, was entitled to the final say over what happened to his body. If you feel differently, that's between you and your family.

I am not here to debate bodily autonomy or right to privacy with you. I saw from your other comments you have some strong feelings about that. What I will say, is I have worked hard to create a relationship with my children where they feel comfortable coming to me with anything. BUT, if there were ever a situation in their life that required them to seek medical care and, for whatever reason, they did not want me to know about it; I prefer they get the care they needed, and I never know, rather than them not seek treatment over fears of my finding out before they were ready to share.