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WirelessBCupSupport t1_iwmf9ux wrote

Ok. This wins todays news. Dead B/F ashes in buttplug. "He's in his favourite place"....

"Its an ASHole!"

132

yzrguy t1_iwmgwso wrote

Alternative title: Shitty boyfriend smuggled in Buttons booty.

8

Dry_Grade9885 t1_iwmp0hd wrote

And did they atleast try to charge her extra for bringing her bf with without paying for him?

137

chasonreddit t1_iwmrg5l wrote

This can't be the first butt plug they've ever seen. Who cares?

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OutlandishCat t1_iwmt6j9 wrote

this is one of the first headlines on this sub that made me stop and reread for a few seconds

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GsTSaien t1_iwmvacc wrote

Bit holesome not gonna lie

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JoanNoir t1_iwmwd99 wrote

A snugly fitting tribute to her boyfriend.

1

ermghoti t1_iwn2kam wrote

Extreme pucker factor. This story has a lot of wrinkles. Seems like a shitty tribue to me though.

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flapadar_ t1_iwn48ot wrote

So that's how Hans Neimann did it

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Dr___Krieger OP t1_iwn4mbq wrote

Replying to flapadar_ (#548,732)

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will be kicked off...

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YakInner4303 t1_iwn7c9o wrote

I guess this means airport security can detect explosive butt plugs. :/

1

TommyTuttle t1_iwn7yqj wrote

Caught? It’s not illegal now is it? I don’t see that anywhere in the list of prohibited items

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DarCam7 t1_iwn8fig wrote

This is too much "internet" even for the internet.

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joshhupp t1_iwnbhin wrote

"It is unclear if she was allowed to take the sex toy with her."

Lol. Can you imagine security asking to have her hand it over?

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Jury_Of_Your_Fears t1_iwnhlb7 wrote

Replying to chasonreddit (#549,351)

LMAO (laugh my ass-plug out) I saw a picture on another article. Half baked publicity stunt, if I had to guess... I mean, it could have been her grandmother's wedding ring, if it's metal and in your butt, you're in for a bad time at the airport.

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paul-d9 t1_iwnib2i wrote

Caught? Its not like she was doing something wrong. What an out of touch title. People should be ashamed to report in what someone decides to do with the ashes of their loved one.

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[deleted] t1_iwnkued wrote

...so she could get internet points

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Mitthrawnuruo t1_iwnpork wrote

I’m not sure we could have a more poignant example of why this useless security theater is a unacceptable invasion of our privacy.

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Ihlita t1_iwnqj3x wrote

Uhh…brand new sentence?

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VintageHacker t1_iwnrkz0 wrote

Funny if those ashes turned out to be some other white powdery type substance, butt nobody was game to check. Law student...

1

Jullyfish t1_iwnv6hg wrote

Oh that was real? I remember seeing that on another sub and I mocked it up as an exaggeration. Who do you even go to to get a butt plug filled with ashes?

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DeeplyTroubledSmurf t1_iwnvh4d wrote

Replying to TommyTuttle (#548,957)

Sex toys in general are illegal in the UAE, so she's more being warned not to step out of the airport until the situation is legal or she'll be arrested.

In this case she'd need to disclose human remains, x-ray the butt-plug which is now declared an urn, and she can carry it with her.

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WillemDafoesHugeCock t1_iwnzpq5 wrote

Wearing a buttplug for a long time is not good for you, only an idiot would wear one for a whole-ass flight.

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TheFirstUranium t1_iwo05yd wrote

Replying to Jullyfish (#550,274)

Well I'd imagine the hard part is getting a hollow butt plug, although someone might make them for smuggling...other substances.

As for the ashes, just throw a little in there out of the urn.

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tangcameo t1_iwo1jcb wrote

Excuse me. Gotta go revise my will.

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rabidmob t1_iwo1uu5 wrote

When the Mile-high club was your dying wish.

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criticalpwnage t1_iwo4vsw wrote

She should have waited until she got to where she was going to put the butt plug in.

1

kevinds t1_iwo97im wrote

Replying to TheFirstUranium (#550,556)

>Well I'd imagine the hard part is getting a hollow butt plug

>She also stated that the sex toy was a gift from her boyfriend before he died

Nothing in the article even says anything about ashes, aside from the first line repeating the headline.. I'm thinking it is just a really bad article.

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MatataTheGreat t1_iwoa98p wrote

I'm guessing she was testing it to see if she could bring drugs next time instead if ashes if it worked the first time.

0

Throckmo t1_iwoabe5 wrote

Did she kill him first ?

1

OldBob10 t1_iwobfov wrote

That’s fucked up.

1

MrMadrona t1_iwocq5w wrote

They're just trying to cheat at chess smh

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neighbor_jim t1_iwoev9d wrote

So is she wearing his cremains up her ass as a sign of affection or as some kind of next-level revenge?

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a_phantom_limb t1_iwojw54 wrote

Any way to verify that this actually happened?

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S-Vagus t1_iwova10 wrote

That's some serious devotion to a partner's orgasm. Bravo!

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Exnixon t1_iwovvxy wrote

We all grieve in different ways.

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ZeroAfro t1_iwp0e45 wrote

My goal in life is to have a woman who would do this if I died in my life. Lol

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liquidtodd t1_iwp107n wrote

This is actually kinda sweet, right? ;-)

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YoosAbitch t1_iwp3xy9 wrote

This would be the ONLY time it would be justified for someone to throw a fit at the airport.

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_welcome t1_iwp7j3q wrote

that's...kind of sweet? in a fucked up way

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DanelleDee t1_iwpfim6 wrote

Explain how the butt plug with his ashes inside of it was a gift from him before he died.

I'm assuming it was hollow? But it's much funnier to imagine him lopping off an extremity and setting it on fire before his death.

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Smugglers151 t1_iwpka54 wrote

Why is this anybody’s business but hers?

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notyourusername1776 t1_iwplusu wrote

Honestly, this woman sounds amazing and I want to be her friend

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dozenspileofash t1_iwposvu wrote

Sarah.....Button

What a fitting name for this incident.

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riktigtmaxat t1_iwpr04v wrote

This is very romantic in a very strange way.

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Shadpool t1_iwpvd05 wrote

Replying to rabidmob (#550,633)

Not always. My dad’s ashes came with the necessary paperwork to get them through security at the airport, should I decide to spread them elsewhere.

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ChriddyBo t1_iwqavr7 wrote

Put ya boyfriend in your bum, it’s fun!

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pikecat t1_iwqcc0d wrote

That must be one big ass butt plug to fit a whole person's ashes in it.

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d4nk0d2 t1_iwqi4c8 wrote

I wish i didnt read this

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danielv123 t1_iwqokii wrote

Replying to RichardSaunders (#550,328)

Airport security is irrational. They can never decide how many trays they want you to use. Put jacket on top of computer vs seperate tray. Stack computers vs not stack. They keep saying shoes on, but with protective boots that's just stupid but some won't listen. With the newer hands up to the sides machines they always say not to take anything off, but they always trip on the shoulders on my wool shirts and then they spend a while searching.

Screwdrivers they only bother to steal like 10% of the time.

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DeeplyTroubledSmurf t1_iwr0jbh wrote

Replying to nagi603 (#555,293)

In the UAE, you have to wear urns dangling around your neck and people need to kiss it as a sign of mourning before speaking to you.

I made that one up, because I think the real answer is just "as long as it's not in an orifice acting as a sex toy".

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