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NoAppointment8430 t1_j1vdgt9 wrote

Not good enough sort some reparations out

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loosemooseweekend t1_j1wjcju wrote

He needs to charter a boat and throw money into the water for reparations. Then the eager people will jump into the water to grab the money and the sharks get fed. win win

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SaishDawg t1_j1vf8oj wrote

One of the saddest short videos I ever saw (sorry, no link as it was a film theater) was a great white who lost its dorsal fins for soup sliding hopelessly into the dark abyss.

I personally never want to be eaten by an apex predator. Equally appreciate Spielberg’s circumspection with the legacy of Jaws. Which is still one of my favorite movies.

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peensteen t1_j1x1kf1 wrote

We need Captain Planet (Don Cheadle, natch) to go around sawing those "fisherman's" fucking arms off.

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TheScrambone t1_j1x81fk wrote

Captain Planet, he’s a hero!

Gonna take fisherman’s arms down to zero!

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Dizzyeer t1_j1vegn8 wrote

I met Spielberg on a trip in the Bahamas, him and his group of buddies would wait by the fishing charters and pay the charters big bucks for live sharks. We would sit around and drink beers and just kill the sharks with hammers. Sometimes he’d pay us to wrestle them. One time he paid me to go on a romantic date with one in a salt water pool. I actually fell in love. I miss her so much.

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GDviber t1_j1vfmxb wrote

You see, a shark's love is very different from that of a square.

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peensteen t1_j1x1rmp wrote

I love sharks, but that doesn't make me a gay fish.

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Crooked_Cock t1_j1wf36k wrote

How about instead of just apologizing you donate some of your mass amounts of wealth to helping conserve and protect sharks

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DilllDozerr t1_j1vdm53 wrote

This is incorrect. He apologized to sharks for jews. Or to jews for sharks... not sure which.

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Sniffy4 t1_j1yl4qe wrote

Jewish Jaws was a lot better than the Gentile version

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GlobalTravelR t1_j1vtbbz wrote

Jaws control the media. Look at 'Shark Week'! You don't see 'Swordfish Week', or 'Blowfish Week!'

There have been more movies about Sharks than any other sea creature. A coincidence? I think not!

/s

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WorldlyCaregiver t1_j1wimfn wrote

>Because of their reputation as a cold-blooded killer, 'no one appreciates how vulnerable they are to destruction', he added.
"It's hard to rally people behind sharks. Unlike whales or dolphins, they are hard to anthropomorphise

Everyone familiar with R34: *Looks away nervously*

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Cynykl t1_j22ikbp wrote

Speaking of R34. In a recent NPR interview the host asked Spielberg if he was aware of the porn parody "Shaving Ryan's Privates". Struck me as an odd question coming from an NPR show.

Found it in the transcript:

GROSS: I've saved this question for the end because it's a very, very important question - very profound, if I might brag. So are you aware, and I assume you may be, that a lot of porn films satirize the titles of real films or satirize the films themselves. And when John Waters was on our show - this was an interview years ago - he said his favorite was "Shaving Ryan's Privates." And there's actually not only a porn film named that, there's a documentary about porn films that satirize real films, and that film, that documentary is titled "Shaving Ryan's Privates." Did you know about that?

SPIELBERG: No (laughter). Not until this very moment. Wow.

GROSS: I told you it was profound.

SPIELBERG: Well, you know, a lot of my films have had, you know, funny and sometimes a little bit of antisemitic uses of the title. So I just never heard that one before.

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ChronoMonkeyX t1_j1vpt2e wrote

Pretty sure Peter Benchley did this decades ago.

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overtired27 t1_j1vu2s8 wrote

Pretty sure Spielberg did too. It’s just a thing that occasionally pops up because he mentions it again in another interview and it makes a good headline.

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AtomicHurricaneBob t1_j1vlu47 wrote

How about apologizing to everyone who refused to go swimming in any body of water.

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GDviber t1_j1vyozq wrote

Or take a bath...

1

peensteen t1_j1x3euv wrote

Hey, hey, Jaws didn't do it, Blizzard did it! If we needed to bathe, there would be a WoW expansion that puts bathtubs in more than two or three locations. Griftah sold me some Soap on a Rope, but I'm not convinced.

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GDviber t1_j1y0qsv wrote

Jaws did it for me long before WoW was even a concept. My Dad took me and my bro to the movie when it came out in '75. I was 9. My Mom wanted to kill him!

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peensteen t1_j1y2h14 wrote

I was just shitting on MMOs. I spent about two months on EverQuest back in the day, before I realized that it's not compatible with life. Jaws literally just scratches the surface. Look up what sorts of nastiness lives in our deep seas, and THAT shit will keep you out of the water for real. I think I'd rather be honestly bitten by a white shark, than even be NEAR a goblin shark.

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GDviber t1_j1y2sv4 wrote

Agreed. I've been nipped surf fishing. Luckily it was a baby hammerhead and must have been scared/surprised. I know I was.

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DFWPunk t1_j1x40kl wrote

I wonder how many people remember that apartments in 1975 were advertising "Shark Free Pools". I do because my mother was apartment hunting and it hadn't occurred to me to be afraid of sharks in pools before I read that.

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Crooked_Cock t1_j1z09yk wrote

This reminds me of the story my mom told me about how as a kid, one of her friends convinced her to watch Jaws and the following night she had a nightmare about, I shit you not, the shark from Jaws chasing her in a swimming pool

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Zombie_Harambe t1_j1vpqwg wrote

It's to keep the big fin mafia off his back.

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FondantGetOut t1_j1vqss9 wrote

Holy shit I thought this said "for Jews"

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Dr-Retz t1_j1wn5zb wrote

They can’t hear,and won’t understand him,I think?

1

EarthlingX420 t1_j1x505d wrote

Nuke the Wales!

1

Ironwolf7448 t1_j1x6goy wrote

Man, even the sharks are canceling people now.

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[deleted] t1_j1yw7fn wrote

[removed]

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1

jbot747 t1_j1zmt1b wrote

I had to read that a few times.

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Effort-Firm t1_j1zy61h wrote

Looking forward to his mega yacht being built! He’s full of shit

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alwaysZenryoku t1_j1z4998 wrote

Now apologize to the rest of us for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

0