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DancesWithTreetops OP t1_jeb7lve wrote

Reply to comment by MarkinDC24 in Archdiocese of Washington and Abuse Cases TW: abuse by DancesWithTreetops

Mark I thoroughly appreciate your response. Truth told just writing down what I wrote, and sending it out to the DC subreddit is the help I was seeking. One day I’m going to send something out and a survivor of Montgomerys predation is going to see it and reach out. Knowing that there are others out there, and not being able to share our experiences is difficult for me. It would be really validating to talk to someone that has stood in the guys presence and knows what I know about him. Because his name is still remembered with a ton of undeserved admiration. And that just doesn’t sit well with me.

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MarkinDC24 t1_jebbdsw wrote

Do not mention it. I would imagine you writing it down, is a form of journaling, which research has shown supports positive PERA (a framework for mental health). In terms of next steps, please know that whatever you decide to do is perfect, and I am not asking for anything specifically. Broadly, I just wanted to know if there was anything that I could do - now - to support.

I have been through my own trauma. Through a supportive network, I confronted my (Physical) abuser, and told the person how their actions have had a negative impact on my life. If people can not confront their abusers, I have been told it can help to visit the sites where trauma occured, or for some talking about the trauma is enough. Whatever one chooses to do, in my case (talking to the abuser), helped me process my trauma - and learn why the other person inflicted the physical trauma on me in the first place. Thus, I hope that I helped break a cycle – the trauma often starts somewhere with someone and spreads like a virus until it is diagnosed/treated.

These fights can be physical and mentally draining. So, just know, you have people waiting on the side lines to support. When one voice gets hoarse, other voices steps in to keep the noise up. If one person needs to rest, another person wakes up to stand guard. A community of survivors who organize. Moblize. Build coalitions.

In solidary.

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DancesWithTreetops OP t1_jebhboe wrote

You’re a class act my friend. Most appreciated. I am an active participant in therapy. I have a great support system and have a nice quiet life. Every couple of months I like to remind the diocese that I’m here and not going away. Not too loud, and not too quiet. Even if they never reply, I’m getting what I need. Sharing my experience on reddit has been a positive experience for me as well. Interactions like this reaffirm my hardwon notion that the world is generally a cool place no matter how cynical I can get. There was a very long time where that notion was not my go to. I also just like the fact that a lot of people in DC see this sub.

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