They could also change the question to: What do you call a smart white person?

And?

Not wondering at all. I don’t live under a rock, after all.

I’m bothered that things like this are happening, and also that there’s a movie out right now called Cocaine Bear.

These have been like that for years. I remember these being in my college cafeteria when I was in college back in 2001-2005. They keep selling, so I guess there’s no reason to correct them.

If it had been invented at the University of Pittsburgh, would it have been called Pitt Stain?

Pro tip- whatever you go, get cumin seed. Toast it on your stovetop and then get a bladed coffee grinder (you can usually find one for really cheap at target or Walmart) to grind it into powder. The flavor will be intense.

Just as long as it never becomes a Wawa

The Jerk Store is running out of them, though.

Whatever you recommend, dear heart!

If only that were the scar on Dumbledore’s knee instead of the London Underground.

I have ancestors who were born in the Ottoman Empire but emigrated to the USA from Greece. Same house.

I like to bite off their legs and say that it’s Lieutenant Dan.

No lie: I actually saw someone with a similar costume pushing Superman in a wheelchair one Halloween.

College towns can be entertaining sometimes.

I mean, maybe if someone invented Mexican Street Corn Pizza it might be good, but I somehow don’t see that happening in Pennsylvania or West Virginia.

I knew I’d seen that one before.

Every time I see anything about construction junction, I always think of Schoolhouse Rock.

Bruno and Borat

I honestly don’t even pay attention anymore. I blame the paper bags at the GetGo. I’m more focused on making sure the bag doesn’t rip open while I’m walking home.

I live a block over from the cricket and haven’t seen it open for awhile.

My money’s on Homegoods or Going! Going! Gone! for that space.