>Ultimately, I personally view relationships as partnerships and as a team to build a life together. I looked for a partner who had the same view. I believe that it is reasonable. I feel from your post that you are second guessing yourself and doubting your boundaries, but they are also extremely reasonable. While he is hesitant to move past his ex, he is also depriving you of being YOUR partner. Breakups are painful, but you lean learn what you did right or wrong and apply that to your next relationship. You don’t have to “erase or delete” a part of your life, but you do have to move past and accept that it is over. Also, on most social media, there are ways to archive posts so they’re not deleted but are no longer public ally available.
Omg this is articulated in a away that is :chef's kiss: amazing! Thank you for putting into words what I've been feeling. That's exactly how I feel. This child is not even born yet and I already know too much about the life he is being born into.
He can have personal archives of his ex's photos but if my family or my friends want to follow him, I do not like the fact that they can see him on dates with an EX he talks to and is pretty much discussing personal details on a daily basis.
I like him overall and we aligned on most things but this is making it really hard to get over. Old me would've gotten into a relationship despite seeing red flags, but now I'm getting too old to ignore this.
Thank you so much for your thorough response. I really appreciate it.
I guess we were both on dating websites and talked about who we were dating while we were also dating each other. I do agree though that if there are people out there that he aligns on this matter, he should be with them rather than choosing to be with me and complaining. I agree that it is an unnecessary comparison and a way to distract from my feelings.
canyouaskfirst OP t1_j6ovaun wrote
Reply to comment by hollsberry in I (29F) am dating a guy (29M) that has a peculiar relationship with his EX - what's your perspective? by canyouaskfirst
>Ultimately, I personally view relationships as partnerships and as a team to build a life together. I looked for a partner who had the same view. I believe that it is reasonable. I feel from your post that you are second guessing yourself and doubting your boundaries, but they are also extremely reasonable. While he is hesitant to move past his ex, he is also depriving you of being YOUR partner. Breakups are painful, but you lean learn what you did right or wrong and apply that to your next relationship. You don’t have to “erase or delete” a part of your life, but you do have to move past and accept that it is over. Also, on most social media, there are ways to archive posts so they’re not deleted but are no longer public ally available.
Omg this is articulated in a away that is :chef's kiss: amazing! Thank you for putting into words what I've been feeling. That's exactly how I feel. This child is not even born yet and I already know too much about the life he is being born into.
He can have personal archives of his ex's photos but if my family or my friends want to follow him, I do not like the fact that they can see him on dates with an EX he talks to and is pretty much discussing personal details on a daily basis.
I like him overall and we aligned on most things but this is making it really hard to get over. Old me would've gotten into a relationship despite seeing red flags, but now I'm getting too old to ignore this.