It's probably worth following up with the university, but I would assume it's just a scam. If they call you again tell them they should make all communications by mail and then see what happens

You're a millionaire asking if you should finance a $40k truck. What the hell...

Are your parents willing to cosign a mortgage for a bunch of teenagers?

Yeah my wife and I just get our paychecks deposited into our joint bank account and then transfer out a set equal amount to each of our own accounts for our discretionary spending. Feels more like our finances are a team effort and everything is more transparent that way, but we still have the freedom to make a silly purchase here or there without asking for permission

We're never going to know enough of the nitty gritty details of your personal finances to give you good advice on this. You need to hire a CPA.

You think moving twice will be less stressful? Just make your offer on the new house contingent on the sale of your current one or get a bridge loan

Cancel the lawn service, cut down to 1 streaming service at a time, find a cheaper barber, and eat cheaper foods until you get that debt paid off

No, that's not how it works. Where did your enlistment bonus go?

Wait, is her current car leased or financed? You're mixing up terms here and it would make a big difference

"hold my beer"

-OP's car, kitchen appliances, and HVAC system

What do you mean when you say you don't need emergency money? Is your emergency fund somewhere else or do you literally believe that you don't need an emergency fund?

At least "going back to his main job" meams he gets to just keep playing the sport he just won. I figure it has to be really weird for those obscure sport Olympic athletes who win a gold medal and then go back to their random office job or whatever

Alimony is mostly based on gross income, not current assets

Go back to work and save up until you have enough in liquid assets to fund your gap year plus an extra cushion for unexpected expenses and/or delays in getting your job back. You can't just jump into something like this without prior planning

Those aren't meant to fund a "gap year" lol. OP needs to go back to work

The best investment an 18 year old high school graduate can make is in getting more education. Note that this does not have to mean a traditional 4 year university if that's not for you. What you have saved will probably get you all the way through a trade school certification program