wathcman
wathcman t1_je7nf9h wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] I have a giant world ending laser pointed down at the earth. In 2 hours I will activate it and blow everyone to smithereens. AMA by TheWizOfPants
Quick, bring out the fun sized mirror!
wathcman t1_jdtm637 wrote
Reply to comment by Ox_of_Dox in [WP] “Look, I’m only paid to patrol this mall at night, not to settle turf wars going on between the damn mannequins!” by W1ngedSentinel
"You guys don't even have legs!"
wathcman t1_jd155l5 wrote
Reply to Dollar Tree can't afford to sell eggs anymore by halxp01
the dollar store sold eggs?
wathcman t1_jcrqr1u wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] Everyone has something referred to as “Narrative Potential Energy” the higher this value is, the more involved in a story you are. Protagonists have a high amount as they drive the story forward, and background characters have little. Somehow you have negative narrative potential. by -Mothonawall-
I guess that just means you live on the other side of the world from where any of the plot takes place
wathcman t1_jci73xh wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP]There is a door with a single key hole. It will open regardless of the key that is used. All keys can open this door, but what's on the other side, however, depends entirely on the key. by Fuzzybluesock
"This is the LockPicking Lawyer and what I have for you today is..."
wathcman t1_jcdct11 wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] "Inside this box, you'll find the answer to every question about the origins of human life. But you're not ready to open it." by Veronica_Cotrim_1997
Is it a note scribbled with the number 42?
wathcman t1_jarbw2p wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP]"Halt, foul beast! You shall threaten this town no longer!" Yelled the hero, drawing their blade, an ancient artefact that glowed and became razor sharp in the presence of evil.. except it wasn't only not glowing, but dulled as the hero pointed it at the 8' tall man-wolf huddled in the corner by Zagreus7777
Oh sweet you can now use it as a mace
wathcman t1_ja71q3c wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] After arriving at magic school, it is time for you to meet your spirit animal. Instead of a Lion or a Eagle however, you get… a Capybara. by Important_Ad_3
Ah yes, friendship incarnate. Careful it can bite!
wathcman t1_ja71mf6 wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] Humanity, the parasites of the universe were banished to a remote galaxy, and had all knowledge of the intergalactic Federation removed. Against all odds they returned. by SexySocks7
Reminds me of a short story I read where eldridge horrors from beyond attacked a world and started devouring everything like some sort of zerg swarm, turns out those eldidge beings were humans colonizing a planet fully populated by sentient plants
wathcman t1_ja716il wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in [WP] When a god summoned your group of friends to save his magical realm, he allowed all five of you to choose your appearance in this world. The first two of your friends chose to be idealized adult versions of themselves. The next two chose fantasy races. Everyone was suprised by your choice... by Martinus_XIV
So the walking Trees from lord of the rings but with artillery cannons mounted on?
wathcman t1_ja710ws wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] When a god summoned your group of friends to save his magical realm, he allowed all five of you to choose your appearance in this world. The first two of your friends chose to be idealized adult versions of themselves. The next two chose fantasy races. Everyone was suprised by your choice... by Martinus_XIV
I think i'd go for cat
wathcman t1_ja70plw wrote
Reply to comment by MorganWick in [WP] Demons escaping hell and creating businesses on Earth is more common than you’d think. Most create bars, casinos, and other dens of sin. You were different. You were tired of sin. You built as 50’s style ice cream parlour. by HonestAbe1809
I'm not familiar with the restaurants itself, is it bad or something?
wathcman t1_ja3dwmi wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] You, a human, somehow gets a job at a hotel that caters to the secret world of monster folk. When your lich boss finds out, he decides to keep you around instead of erasing your memory. You are an incredibly competent worker, and good workers are hard to keep. by AnthonyisClueless
prepare to get ressurected as an undead after death
wathcman t1_ja3bv19 wrote
Reply to comment by Aftel43 in [WP] you entered the super power lottery, and now all the liquid in your body is alcohol, turns out that not everyone wins after all. by Tokumeiko2
Maybe not, you could do a short story of police investigators investigating this super power lottery thing and the blood to alcohol prompt being the latest victim
wathcman t1_ja3aosm wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] You’re an exorcist — well, sort of. For one, you exorcise angels. by MagicTech547
Insert priest warding jokes here
wathcman t1_ja3adjk wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] Today marks the beginning of the Apocalypse, and as you begin panicking you hear a knock on your door. You answer the door to find a person with the nametag "Plague" holding a scythe and black robes, saying your horse is outside. by PhrogFace420
I guess one of the horsemen couldn't make it to the event
wathcman t1_ja092ir wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] Ever since you took over your parents little mom and pop shop time travellers have been trying to kill you. Apparently you will turn this little shop into a ruthless and exploitative megacorporation. The only problem is that you have no intentions of expanding your business. by Kitty_Fuchs
and thus the shop is forced to turn into a ruthless megacorporation because you need the money to hire people and develop technologies to fend off and survive the constant stream of assassination attempts
wathcman t1_j9y6gg7 wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] "I'm tired of chess, everyone always challenges me and I always win in the end" Death moans. "I want to mix things up a bit this time" he says, indicating your shelves of Warhammer 40k miniatures. by Visual_Philosopher74
Death: If I wanted to play the board game version of my job I'd follow war instead
wathcman t1_j98ugqy wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] The fights between the Superheroes and Supervillains are one big game of cops-and-robbers, just people with powers and costumes fighting each other and causing destruction while regular people just have to survive them. One day, a regular man goes out and just... kills one of the Supers. by DieterVonDietrich
Isn't batman just a regular dude with a lot of money?
wathcman t1_j941xws wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] The villagers call you their guardian spirit that has protected them since the time of ashes, in truth you are a monstrosity of war that protects the village in an attempt to clear your conscience. by Sorrow41
I think I'd like to see a medieval fantasy story but all the magical fantasy stuffs just junk from a non magical civilization that left for the stars long ago
wathcman t1_j8upwzc wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] A young couple watches the White House burn down after the government is overthrown and reflects on their future. by BilulaBall
This reminds me of when The Onion wrote an article about a the US government faking a military coup on itself to deal with its rising national debt
wathcman t1_j8uoncc wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] In a galaxy that is quite xenophobic and isolationist humanity is the odd one out. We generally like aliens and want to get along. When they turned us down, we redoubled our efforts. Now our fleet is orbiting the alien's home world. We may no longer come in peace, but they will be our friends. by Kitty_Fuchs
The galaxy must search for the metal heads before theyre overrun by the fanatic befrienders
wathcman t1_j8gd9tn wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] on a whim you decide to pick up your sharpest pencil and stab the air in a fencing stance, you accidentally stab through the eye of a invisible spy. by Objective-Ice8233
"INTRUDER ALERT! A RED SPY IS IN THE BASE!"
wathcman t1_jedxney wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] You get reincarnated as a blue whale with the memories of the whaling era as a part of your bargain with God to try and change the fate of the species. by Flaky_Explanation
10 years later the reincarnated whale is drowned by a group of bored killer whales. The End