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Showerthoughts_Mod t1_iy5b7n7 wrote

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HALF_PAST_HOLE t1_iy5bp13 wrote

Look in to David Carradine (Bill from Kill Bill amongst many other films) him nor the many others like him did not die in a graceful way lets just say!

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ahuffaPUFG t1_iy5by9m wrote

It happens way more than you would think. Auto erotic asphyxiation is the real killer of some of these celebrity “suicide”

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alcobain1967 t1_iy5dpr7 wrote

Story time: I'm a retired cop. The last 11 years of my career I was a detective assigned to our crime scene unit. I was on day shift. Got a call for a dead guy. Guy was about 60 and was a farmer. Wife leaves to go shopping. When she left, he was working in the pasture.
She comes home and he's dead, naked, in their bed. He's got two huge rubber bands looped around his legs and then wrapped around his dick. The guy just wanted to have a little wank and died in the most embarassing way-at least for his wife. That was a memorable scene.

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HarryHacker42 t1_iy5lasq wrote

There is a probably a reddit sub with pictures of these incidents.

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Boatwhistle t1_iy5pa80 wrote

Men who die nude can have extremely bloated gentles from decomposition given enough time before discovery.

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KindaWrongContext t1_iy5pzyr wrote

Replying to ahuffaPUFG (#743,949)

A joke popped into my head - 3 guys go to a hospital, the receptionist is puzzled because they all have a hanging lower jaw. When asked for explanation, one guy says: "papew an pen ples!" After receiving a paper and a pencil he explains: "hello I'm Mark. I was at my mates b'day party when this one guy says if you put a lightbulb into your mouth and I tickle your butthole, your jaw will lock out. No way I said, never heard such bullshit. After arguing for a while I decided to prove him wrong. I inserted a lightbulb into my mouth, dropped my pants and let him tickle my butthole and what do you know! It really did disable my jaw. So I went to the birthday boy Alex to let him know that I had to leave and go to the hospital. Alex couldn't believe me and thought I was pranking him. Just to be sure I was not losing my mind and to prove him he agreed to try it out and now here we are. Alex is to my left. Third guy is our uber driver. When he saw us He didn't want to pick us up. After an explanation he started laughing hysterically in disbelief. He wouldn't drive us to the hospital until he tried it out too. Lightbulb into mouth and I tickled his butthole. Please help : - ) " the receptionist, unsure what to feel, shakes her head and takes the note to a doctor. 5 minutes pass and the receptionist returns to the 3 guys jaw ajar "jeh ples, fowwow me"

Now... I wonder if that's how people die to autoerotic asphyxiation?

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mcshadypants t1_iy5q1tj wrote

Yea, finding a dead body of a love one isnt traumatic enough to overwhelm that awkwardness /s

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Realistic_Ad3795 t1_iy5s5m4 wrote

I think a co-worker died this way while out of town visiting one of our other plants. No one has said for sure, but context clues lead me to believe that the other co-worker that found him (after hotel secruity did a well check when he didn't meet up in the morning) discovered he may have been watching porn.

No asphyxiation or wrapped genitals or anything. Just laying in bed doing good old missionary wanking to a video and had a heart attack.

His reluctantly-estranged-but-not-yet-divorced wife worked under me at the same company and I had to tell her. That is something I will never forget.

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Flodartt t1_iy5v8xz wrote

The French president Félix Faure died in his presidential office when his mistress was doing him a blowjob. The mistress then got in all the France the nickname "pompe funèbre" which is a pun "pompe funèbre" being the french expression to design funeral enterprises but "pompe funèbre" can also be literally translated as "funeral pump".

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AwsumO2000 t1_iy5zyq5 wrote

I think all paramedics / emergency service people have a myriad of stories relating to this subject

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KamiComi t1_iy62x9z wrote

Yeah there's videos online of this stuff happening. I remember seeing one of some old dude jerking off naked in front of his computer and had a heart attack or something. The video kept going until his wife found him later.

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alcobain1967 t1_iy6aezs wrote

Replying to nicokokun (#749,609)

I believe it helped him achieve and maintain his erection. The wife was so embarassed, but I never got to talk to her. The medical examiner and another detective did that. I did go to the autopsy and collected the rubber bands as evidence just in case something suspicious popped up later. It was classified as a natural death as the cause of death was heart/coronary issues. But I guess he died doing something he enjoyed.......

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TheReinsofFullnight t1_iy6f42q wrote

I read a story about this couple, their teenage daughter died of erotic asphyxiation while alone. They didn’t hide it at all what happened to her. They wanted the public to know the dangers of it.

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djheru t1_iy6gm1l wrote

Not as awkward as finding someone who died from autoerotic asphyxiation (David Carradine)

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jumpofffromhere t1_iy6ijtl wrote

you could be like the guy in Pompeii, forever jerking that last one out before disaster

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DerangedBeaver t1_iy6jajl wrote

As a former EMT, I can say with good certainty that waaaay more people die naked than you would think.

At least two of the first three or four dead people I got called to were naked.

Blood don’t pump when you’re dead, so who would be able to tell if you were wringing the ol’ ding ding? We all die floppy, my friend; salute your salami without worry

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[deleted] t1_iy6jk23 wrote

former EMT. You'd be surprised how often that happens. emphasis on former.

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gregarioussparrow t1_iy6m828 wrote

Who knows, maybe finding a deceased in that situstion is someones kink?

Ew.

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sunshinefireflies t1_iy6nyxq wrote

Replying to AwsumO2000 (#748,560)

Worst I had was trying to find a way to explain to the wife that her husband had had a heart attack while enjoying time in a hotel room with another woman.. who didn't know he was married..

Funeral was complex.

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Laser716 t1_iy6ou61 wrote

Replying to alcobain1967 (#744,266)

My aunt was a cop for 30-ish years (beat cop for most of her career, retired as a Captain). She tells the story of finding an older man dead in his chair and completely naked. When the heart stops pumping, the blood pools down in the body. Certain tissues expand when filled with blood.

The punch line is "there was a fly on it!"

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funkychicken23 t1_iy6ssba wrote

Replying to ahuffaPUFG (#743,949)

That actually happened to my RA freshman year. We didn’t see him for a few days, someone reported a smell coming from the room, and they found him inside - died in the act. It was pretty fucked up.

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NSA_Chatbot t1_iy6szmc wrote

I remember reading a story where a guy made his apartment into a mastabatorium, porn on every surface. It wasn't enough so he made a porn helmet and anyway it got caught in the light fixture and he died.

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lordofedging81 t1_iy6u93n wrote

Replying to TheReinsofFullnight (#751,658)

Future sex ed books:

"Now you may want to explore touching your body for pleasure. This is natural. But please...do not put a noose around your neck when exploring your sexuality. This is extremely dangerous and can lead to death."

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hawkwings t1_iy6unjm wrote

When playing a video from your C drive, it is possible to turn "Replay" on so that the same video will play repeatedly. This means that you could die and people who found your body would see the video still playing.

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M0XNIX t1_iy6vcqy wrote

Like 20 years ago there was a dude who was driving around jerking off, and I guess like "hip thrusting" to show off his dick to adjacent cars.

So since he was "hip thrusting" that brings his torso up, and his lower parts away from the pedals.

He is approaching a busy intersection and mixed up the gas and brakes, goes pedal to the metal, swerves to the right, up and over the corner and crashed in the wall of a bank at a really high speed- this was like 3PM broad day light, all the bank customers and people using the ATM etc came to his aid. Naked from the waist down, wasn't wearing his seatbelt (so he could better show off his junk), and I guess at the moment of impact he was like in that hip thrust state - essentially with his cock and balls on the steering wheel when he hit the wall.

(Source - I saw the accident scene (after) driving by, and my mother was the bank manager who had to handle the customers, injured and emergency response etc and told me about it later that night)

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BlackbirdRedwing t1_iy6wm68 wrote

It happens often enough that there's different names for each way it happens, autoerotic asphyxiation to name one

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Danmont88 t1_iy6wrjc wrote

Replying to TheReinsofFullnight (#751,658)

Many US Air Force bases are really just small towns. Word gets around pretty fast.

When a high-level Officer retires there is usually a big to do. Change of Command Ceremony, a party, usually with cake, etc. This takes some time to get together and hopefully his replacement will have enough time to get there.
Usually, the notice of retirement takes place six months to a year in advance.

It was a real surprise when a Colonel, the Base Commander, walked into the retirement office early one Monday morning and told the people he was going to retire, and they asked when.
He told them, "If at all possible, today, make it happen."

Everyone in the office was stunned and the Personnel Commander took him in to an office to talk to him. When they came out the Personnel Commander told the people to get to work on it. I guess they pulled it off.

Later it came out that the Base Commander had to take his 16 year old daughter to the base Emergency Room because she had a Coca Cola bottle in her pussy and couldn't get it out.

The Commander knew word would get around so, he retired.

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FractalSymmetry_ t1_iy6xhef wrote

Of course they have. Haven’t you heard of autoerotic asphyxiation ? 😬

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moomoo_cow_ t1_iy6xmqf wrote

there was this old adult movie store in my town that had like, stalls???, that you could use with rented movies and an older man had apparently passed in one of them with a c0ck ring on

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mad-pandaz t1_iy6yttv wrote

ah my country a have few, sadly some were teenagers, masturbating till super tired and die of exhaustion

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nobecauselogic t1_iy70hmg wrote

I really don’t think it would be awkward. It’s not like the dead person can be embarrassed.

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imnotsoho t1_iy70uht wrote

David Carradine. Not watching porn, but wanking while hanging himself. Most of these don't make the news. Happens all the time, and will keep on happening unless we get past the embarrassment stage.

I have a cousin who was a fireman. Being up north the frequently went to scenes where a young couple died of CO poisoning doing what teenagers do. Sometimes they were still hooked up. Never made the news to warn other teens.

Some episodes of self involvement can be dangerous, we all need to know.

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GoaheadAMAita t1_iy72b1s wrote

In college true story…..

Amongst all the sports teams at Boise State the college did a competition for which team could give back the most to the community. You know like volunteering donations and or what not.

This fucking cross country/track dudes on the team took in a homeless dude and put him up in the master bedroom. This homeless dude proceeded to die half way through beating his dick pants down. Couple weeks of endless Wi-Fi will get to you eventually. Sad story.

Anyways comes to the end of the competition and the winner is………. Not the cross country track dudes. These guys were so pissed that they didn’t win that they called out whomever chose the winners.

They, 8 lived at house, gave a guy the master room and hopefully peace before he finally passed. All for a damn tv to be put in the teams locker room..

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wakatenai t1_iy73xle wrote

he died doing what he loved, jackin' it to..(checks search history)...oh...oh my god.

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Ginandexhaustion t1_iy75tzr wrote

Walking in on someone who is aware they are being walked in on while watching porn is so much more awkward than finding a corpse with porn on in the background. Dead Men tell no tales, hardly awkward.

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KindaWrongContext t1_iy7l2u0 wrote

Replying to EaterOfFungus (#754,231)

Sry if I misunderstood but you need an explanation?

The joke is that nobody believed such ridiculous method would work and had to try it out themselves and in the end even the receptionist tried it with the doctor in another room.

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TheReinsofFullnight t1_iy825ym wrote

Replying to Danmont88 (#755,131)

Omg. Horrific.

Going to edit this since I’m married to a doctor lol. Word getting out at the hospital is really a huge HIPPA violation. If one nurse and doctor knew, well then he would know who spread the word, and who would get their licenses revoked.

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Danmont88 t1_iy8flfn wrote

Replying to TheReinsofFullnight (#762,253)

Well before the age of HIPPA. Many military bases have limited number of nurses and use Medical Technicians.

People that live in dorms have a tendency to drink and talk.

How many people saw her before the doctor did?

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