Life Happens Because of Us

I remember when my daughter was born. How could I not.

The doctor handed her over to me wrapped tightly in the pink-and-blue striped hospital blanket, her skin yellowed from jaundice. At that moment she was rivaling my wife for the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

This was Gemma. This was the daughter I longed for and fell in love with while reading Dr. Seuss and Eric Carle to my wife’s belly.

A month before, I stood stuck in Babies R’ Us as a first-time dad overwhelmed by the high shelves of baby products the marketing on the packages said I needed. I didn’t know. Who trusted me with this kid again? I didn’t know. I got it all because I wanted her to have what she needed. I wanted her to be safe.

In the delivery room Gemma had been crying the whole time, but stopped immediately as soon as the doctor gave her to me and I started talking to her. My wife was asleep, exhausted, but everyone in the room witnessed this, the obstetrician, two nurses, my-mother-in law. She remembered my voice. She knew she was safe.

But the color vanished from my mother-in-law’s face. Her joy transformed into worry because at that moment she saw what a loving, first-time dad at first glance could not. She saw that Gemma had Down Syndrome.

There is no plot to the story we all find ourselves in. And we can’t choose when we enter or when we leave. We are all written into the Grand Novel with just a few blank pages. Though few, our pages are important. They can’t be penned by Shakespeare or vicariously lived through your favorite streamer. Only you can write them.

So, how do you make the most of it?

We need to be the harbingers of our own life.

Life will happen to us, that we can’t control. But we can control how it impacts us. Understand life for the joy that it is and embrace it. Like I did with Gemma. Approach each day with intentionality, perseverance, and curiosity, and I promise you will look back proud of the pages you wrote, and finding the true secret of happiness lies in taking a genuine interest in all the details of daily life.

Gemma’s in middle school now, and her contagious joy immediately lifts your soul as soon as she smiles. And she’s always smiling. She loves ballet and Roald Dahl, she has a ravenous appetite for chocolate, and a great group of friends. She still rivals my wife as the most beautiful girl in the world, and there’s no one my mother-in-law loves more than “Gems”. She didn’t choose to have Down Syndrome but to her, that doesn’t matter. Because if you know Gemma, you know she’s a harbinger.

Yeah, life happens to us, but also, make life happen because of us.

This is a true story. What’s yours?