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leopard_eater t1_ismv3f9 wrote

Reply to comment by SexyAcanthocephala in Child reportedly stabbed to death by her mother at NW Harris County park, sheriff says by OrigamiKitties

I genuinely believe that you should have to apply for a parenting license, a farming license, and a pet ownership license, and their should be training courses for each.

I’m totally ok with the parenting preparation classes to be free and a little bit generic, because I don’t want there to be income and racial biases to obtaining a license. But I want that license to come with renewals, perhaps an annual early years short course and then some spaced out ones until annual teenage ones, but seriously there are so many fucked up parents out there, it’s incredible.

And suffice to say - though I haven’t done too bad of a job so far with my kids (three are grown up, happy relationships, good jobs and we are all close, one still at home who even talks to me when not attached to protein and an electronic device), I would have loved to have had some parenting classes at times, or just someone to ask questions. Every parent has at least some challenging situations with their children, from not knowing if they’re teething or how to handle teenage backchatting.

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MaximilienHoneywell t1_ismy7hj wrote

While your frustrations are reasonable and spot on, these solutions really are somewhat fascist, and the unintended consequences from such policies could be catastrophic.

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leopard_eater t1_isn2l2r wrote

I know, it’s so hard to understand what to do.

It would be nice if there were more parenting classes that could simply be sent to your phone if you subscribed. I also know in Australia there used to be a parent line where you could call at any time and say that you couldn’t handle your child screaming or you were feeling depressed, and they’d give you strategies to calm down or send help out to you if you needed it. I also know that Utah had a ‘baby return slot’ in the side of some hospitals where you could essentially surrender your baby by putting it into the slot, ringing the bell and leaving, no questions asked.

Some of these sorts of things can help parents that just can’t handle it. And that’s ok if they can’t, I’d rather their child be safe and them not having to be a parent anymore if they don’t want to be.

But agreed, there really isn’t a way to ensure that a parenting license doesn’t become eugenics or christofacism, though I wish it wasn’t so.

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SleazyMak t1_isp28re wrote

When all proposed solutions are worse than the problem they’re trying to solve, you’re left with finding another solution (there is none) or accepting that some problems can’t be fully solved.

Better education and free access to mental health services would help this problem - but there’s no solving it as Americans would revolt if you tried to ban certain people from having kids. And they’d be right to do so.

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StuperDan t1_ismwa7m wrote

Who gets to decide who is allowed to procreate? You? People who agree with your worldview? What happens if you don't agree with the deciders?

You can't legislate biological functions and imperatives. You might as well make a law requiring rain only on Wednesdays. No human is capable of playing god this way.

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SideburnSundays t1_isn9ha6 wrote

It has nothing to do with world views. It has to do with a) being mentally stable, and b) providing basic care, neither of which are the slightest bit subjective.

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StuperDan t1_isn9wj3 wrote

How do you propose this parental fitness standard you imagine be administered and enforced? And again, who decides the standards?

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EnvironmentalSound25 t1_ispl61k wrote

Basics. Lack of abuse. Stable housing, food, etc.

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Quilva t1_isrv6uv wrote

Plenty of people only turn abusive after the stress of raising a child

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SideburnSundays t1_isnbd5s wrote

Psychiatry and psychology already have objective standards based on the scientific method. That’s my entire point that you’re failing to grasp.

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StuperDan t1_isne2kb wrote

I don't think many practicing psychiatrists or psychologists would agree with your sophomoric assertion.

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DearMrsLeading t1_isq67qz wrote

I had a psychologist in high school that thought being gay should be considered a mental illness still. Every group has shitty people that don’t follow the standards.

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EnvironmentalSound25 t1_isn467v wrote

We do already remove children from unstable care providers. Proposing that we screen all parents before something awful happens isn’t that far of a reach.

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Isord t1_isn67zt wrote

It's a pretty fucking far reach since you'll need to engage in forced abortions, sterilizations, etc.

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EnvironmentalSound25 t1_isn6dpx wrote

That’s more than a reach, that’s a fucking leap. I’m talking about protecting kids, not sterilizing people.

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Isord t1_isn6fwt wrote

Any plan to control who has children and who does not inherently requires those.

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EnvironmentalSound25 t1_isn6tgb wrote

Sorry, I guess I’m not being clear — I’m not referring to controlling who is allowed to procreate at all. My point is that many societies already do have some systems in place to control the conditions under which children may be raised. No forced abortion nor sterilization required.

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Isord t1_isn7aeh wrote

Ah, the top of the chain was talking about controlling reproduction so I assumed that is what you meant.

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MexusRex t1_isnxosz wrote

You’re mad. These would be abused and filled with corruption.

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sluttyjamjams73 t1_isri9nv wrote

Everything is abused and filled with corruption. But shit parenthood is just WIDE OPEN?

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leopard_eater t1_isnxvai wrote

Yes sadly it just couldn’t be done safely, unfortunately. The road to hell is often paved with good intentions.

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[deleted] t1_ismx9b3 wrote

[deleted]

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leopard_eater t1_isn23zu wrote

If we actually made this commensurate with more supports for families, it could work.

I’m watching the announcement made last night by our Australian PM about the increase in parental leave from 3-6 months, paid by the government. That is on top of the four weeks paid sick leave that women can accrue to help them initially prepare for and/or recover from the initial phases of childbirth, and the four weeks paid annual leave that they can also take.

Given that a spouse can also take four weeks of personal or carers leave (for holidays, the birth or anything), this means that a woman and her partner can take four weeks off before the birth (birth parent), four weeks annual leave or sick/carers leave after the birth (spouse supporting finances during that time), then they can choose to mix it up how they want from there.

Additionally, many workplaces offer additional paid or unpaid maternity leave and parent leave, most Australian low and middle income earners get a child supplement payment fortnightly, and if the birth parent suffers serious medical injuries due to the birth and needs more time off, their compulsory fortnightly retirement account pays a stipend after three months, and the employer is obligated to keep their job open for up to two years from the claim. They can backfill it during this time, but they must retain the birth parents right to return after recovery.

Let’s see if this increases birth rates. It might not, but I’m curious.

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mreed911 t1_isn3qa8 wrote

Nothing is “paid for by the government.” It’s all paid for by the citizens, collectively.

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leopard_eater t1_isn64cq wrote

Yes, to the tune of 0.1% of our federal budget, which is less money than our last PM spent of tax payers cash to fly to Hawaii to meet with the head of his evangelical Christian church, and then diverted into said church as charitable donations.

We know what democratic socialism means in Australia and we fucking like it.

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mreed911 t1_isn7z1w wrote

All of the government money comes from its citizens.

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leopard_eater t1_isn9frw wrote

Are you broken?

Yes - you said that before, and I responded.

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mreed911 t1_isna65p wrote

You said .1%. I said “all.”

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