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1714alpha t1_jbck9xt wrote

This is the single most depressing item ever marketed. It's the magic of nostalgia for the innocence of childhood, mixed with the cheap booze needed to numb the pain of your 3rd failed marriage, crushing debt, and shitty 60hr/week job. The kid who first tipped the sharp plastic edge of the bottle to their anticipating lips is now the broken mid-lifer grimly drinking alone from a dented can in the Walmart parking lot.

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LittleKitty235 t1_jbh4ljj wrote

It’s not the drink we asked for, but it’s the one we deserve

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stoneysmoke t1_jbfidzx wrote

But at least it's not marshmallow flavored vodka. Official drink of every future Karen.

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Scrubbing_Bubbles_ t1_jbcn396 wrote

I'll wait for the Capri Sun Vodka Seltzer. I want my cheap booze out of a pouch through a straw.

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SUCHANASTYW0MAN t1_jbenw1v wrote

https://drinksunice.com

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peensteen t1_jbh5cbs wrote

At least these don't have stupid sexually suggestive joke names. I hate that shit. Those things are perfect for trailer park blackouts, Krystal celebrating CPS finally freeing up her budget, and holding against that shiner that Ray Ray gifted Tammy Lynn after the Eagles lost.

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Miss_Deschaneaux t1_jbhu5si wrote

There are at least 3 bars where I live that make adult Capri Suns. The future is now.

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moon_buzz t1_jbcghgm wrote

I prefer the purple stuff

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peensteen t1_jbh3grf wrote

Literally every other drink in that commercial was better than Sunny Delight. Just drink orange juice, this stuff is vile.

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stoneysmoke t1_jbcdvog wrote

Nah, it's much better when you mix vodka with the carrier substance in an old milk jug.

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[deleted] t1_jbclcl4 wrote

[deleted]

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stoneysmoke t1_jbfi5he wrote

Yeah, but damn kids these days are putting vitamins and electrolytes in that shit. They're doing it to keep from getting ruffied. That's a lot more responsibility and good thinking than we did back in the day. I'm not sure it's the same thing.

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blakeley t1_jbd0gjg wrote

I can taste the heartburn…

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TypicalJeepDriver t1_jbexds8 wrote

Dude I’m sayin. As a kid I had an iron stomach and Sunny D always gave me heartburn. Turning it to a seltzer would absolutely light me up. Hard pass.

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blakeley t1_jbg1ivy wrote

I thought it was only me! And it was painful and immediate, could never me figure how others could continue drinking it.

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haterhurter1 t1_jbexxgl wrote

i actually only drink sunny d now as it's the only orange juice type drink that i don't get acid reflux from.

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blakeley t1_jbg1s6y wrote

That’s amazing, Sunny D was just straight up acid for me.

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DorkySloot t1_jbcceu2 wrote

I can feel the tooth decay already…

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TheCalebGuy t1_jbcifx6 wrote

Yeah no, all I'm thinking when I hear this is fizzy hella watered down Sunny D.

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bigbangbilly t1_jbckscz wrote

Goes well with that Velma tv show.

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ItsOkItOnlyHurts t1_jbe77qf wrote

What in the crying-in-the-shower-to-Mr-Brightside is this?

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Theometer1 t1_jbesoyw wrote

Why is everyone and their mother making a seltzer?

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poopchute_boogy t1_jbe1gjw wrote

The first and only booze you can buy with food stamps

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rtels2023 t1_jbex6ep wrote

Couldn’t this be considered marketing alcohol to children? Feels wrong to me

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m0le t1_jbf49si wrote

Well, at least your bloated distended corpse will be an interesting radioactive yellow colour.

Is anyone still drinking seltzers? I thought that fad had passed. Might be wishful thinking.

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VagCookie t1_jbhf4wc wrote

I actually really like seltzer in general, so I still occasionally have a seltzer but I'm not like a big drinker so maybe once a week I'll crack one open.

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