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yowen2000 t1_jefqq78 wrote

The easiest thing to do is to ask A out, from there everything else falls into place, whether he says yes or no. You'll know for sure if A likes you and H will know you don't like them (romantically).

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Zealousideal-Meet588 t1_jefrv17 wrote

There's another issue between A and me. I updated the post. A is my ex's collegues.

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yowen2000 t1_jefuthw wrote

If A is really good friends with your ex, do you really want to be in that position?

Has A mentioned it being awkward that he is friends with your ex?

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Zealousideal-Meet588 t1_jefx4oq wrote

I avoided A as a dating prospect for this reason only..but this time we met, I realised there's a chemistry between us. We spoke about my ex as well. And A's opinion was that now that your ex broke up with you and us dating someone else he should have no opinion on your life about who you date or meet. And since my ex had an objection with me being in touch with A, A commented he would stay friends even if my ex had an issue with it

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yowen2000 t1_jegd93m wrote

Sure, your ex has no opinion here.

But you and A do, so again, do you want to be in the situation where you're dating someone that your ex is close to?

And in all of the above, I mean this in the kindest way possible, but you said a lot, without saying much at all, we don't know if A has reservations about it too. Unless you thought he was referring to himself.

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VanMan32 t1_jefppkw wrote

So is H his cousin or his brother? Why not just point blank just tell A how you feel about him?

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Zealousideal-Meet588 t1_jefqetz wrote

I want to first confirm if A also likes me or not. Cz there's a restraint here. I broke up an year and half ago from my ex of 5 years. And A is his colleagues. We met through my ex. He has always respected me and treated me as his homie's gf. I am not sure if he will be able to see me as a potential gf so soon or not. So want to give this friendship a little more time before I confess my feelings

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VanMan32 t1_jefqnkn wrote

Then A probably doesn’t want to cross a certain boundary with his colleague. Also, is H his brother or cousin?

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Zealousideal-Meet588 t1_jefqw0i wrote

Yes. That's the constraint here. Though my ex cheated on me and is dating someone else rn. When he knew I surprised A on his bday, he called me and was pissed off why was I still in touch with his friends. But A and me have been friends for like 2-3 years now. And we have become better friends than A and my ex.

H is cousin of A

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