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Desperate-Ad729 t1_j5lzbfb wrote

I really doubt this is a true story. Drinking at 8 in the morning? Getting drunk off one glass of wine in 3 minutes?

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_Tonan_ t1_j5megic wrote

I think you missed the most questionable part

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commandrix t1_j5mlro5 wrote

It frankly sounds to me like the sort of story an alcoholic might tell. The worst alcoholics won't give a shit about what time of day it is.

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Kris_Krispy t1_j5oojpg wrote

OP’a account was created yesterday… this is his only post

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yonoznayu t1_j5nefkl wrote

I’m not an alcoholic, and in fact prefer not to drink at all whenever possible with the main exception being the new year’s holiday cuz my in-laws are Slavic vodka-loving raisins that get truly offended if you don’t have at least a couple toasts and switching to water/juice won’t do for them. I can get drunk with a single glass of wine, which is a nuisance to my wife and a great copout for me to avoid it altogether when we go out. Sorry, I didn’t know it was that uncommon but I do know never mind the ever present second hand snore, not drinking alcohol it’s a fucking nightmare while trying to socialize or even just dine while in most of Europe.
Edit: added text.

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stlmick t1_j5ozic1 wrote

You have never been to a trailer park.

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Assertive_Pickle t1_j5lzgq6 wrote

kids get drunk faster than adults, ok. and I can drink whenever I want.

−103

Desperate-Ad729 t1_j5lzyzw wrote

I understand that, but 3 minutes is a very short time.

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dpg3456 t1_j5n10l4 wrote

it takes something like an hour to process one drink.

Edit: changed shot to drink

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yonoznayu t1_j5nf1u5 wrote

Interesting. It takes me not 3 minutes but maybe 15,20 min to feel a shot. Basically until the next round comes despite consuming allegedly alcohol-suppressing Slavic food alongside it. Not my culture so what do I know but damn, I do have a very low threshold.

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Coctyle t1_j5oaxni wrote

That’s ridiculous. You don’t process alcohol at all and you can feel the effects of it immediately.

−1

akennelley t1_j5onlss wrote

I have to believe he means processing the drink takes an hour to clear. Alcohol obviously takes immediate effect, and somewhere around an hour per glass/bottle/shot to start to wear off.

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dpg3456 t1_j5ozjen wrote

Yup, that's it. "On average, it takes about one hour to metabolize one standard drink. "

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Coctyle t1_j5phoxc wrote

Metabolizing alcohol is what makes you sober. It is the process of removing the alcohol from the body. That is the process that takes one hour per drink (for an average person).

The comment you originally replied to was in regards to the time it takes to get drunk. The person was doubting that OP got drunk beyond the capacity for rational thought in three minutes.

I share the doubts about the veracity of the post, but it absolutely does not take one hour for alcohol to get into a person’s bloodstream and make the person intoxicated. That’s would be a misunderstanding of what it means to metabolize alcohol.

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dpg3456 t1_j5plvek wrote

I was using the term process in the sense of the alcohol being broken down then released by the body. But I see where the confusion came from.

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dpg3456 t1_j5ozotc wrote

On average, it takes about one hour to metabolize one standard drink.

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Coctyle t1_j5pibg2 wrote

As stated in another response, metabolizing alcohol is the process of breaking it down and removing it from the body. Yes, the body processes alcohol to remove it, but alcohol does not need to be processed by the digestive system to get into the bloodstream and make a person feel drunk.

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dpg3456 t1_j5pm55a wrote

After reading another comment, I see where the misunderstanding came from. My response didn't really have much to do with the comment I replied to.

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dpg3456 t1_j5plnde wrote

That's fair and agree. I didn't say that though. I only said process. Which to me, would mean the processing of said chemical to it's final form and being released by the body.

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Dizzy_Divide_7528 t1_j5m3asf wrote

Do you always shower with your 12 yo or just when the two of you knock back a few?

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mrmike5157 t1_j5maunl wrote

No shit. Wtf is wrong with you OP? That’s not EVER okay, drunk or not. Jeezuz

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[deleted] OP t1_j5m9yq4 wrote

[removed]

−176

notenoughcharact t1_j5mc435 wrote

Dude, you are still in control of your own actions while drunk. There is zero excuse for this ever to happen. I would seriously consider going sober.

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PhlyingMonkey t1_j5m24pj wrote

"My son asked if he and I could have a shower, and I agreed."

Please explain OP, as this doesn't read well.

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quiteawiseone t1_j5m9nbn wrote

Yeah, this right here is the most concerning part of the story.

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bobguy117 t1_j5mkvnj wrote

Sure does read like someone retroactively trying to establish consent being given by a 12 year old doesn't it?

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mylogicistoomuchforu t1_j5mdd34 wrote

Well, with a name like AssertivePickle .... I would guess it's a very prison-like shower experience.

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vannbabu t1_j5m87x7 wrote

what in the cinnamon toast fuck did i just read

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kstweetersgirl2013 t1_j5m1sdl wrote

Not sure this is something to brag about on Reddit but ok.

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CrystalQueen3000 t1_j5lxql1 wrote

Parenting done wrong.

JFC if this is true you suck as a dad.

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Assertive_Pickle t1_j5lyvqo wrote

no, I don't. this was a one-time thing. I told my son this wouldn't happen again.

−85

ZilorZilhaust t1_j5n4b6q wrote

No, you suck. There is no excuse. I have never in my life been drunk or high enough to consider pouring a cup of alcohol for a kid and I've gotten plenty fucked up. You're a real shit Dad if this even true.

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Aliki26 t1_j5m2hmz wrote

1 post -13 Karma for a stupid story…why would you do this? For attention?

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AcrobaticSource3 t1_j5myvzc wrote

I’m sure this questionable story from an account created a few hours ago is legit

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SweetCosmicPope t1_j5mdham wrote

Man, I thought I was about to read a cute story about how your kid had one too many glasses of wine and ruined the carpet. Instead I get to read a story about how this dude basically molested his kid.

WTF dude.

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Logical_Ad_1383 t1_j5m77g2 wrote

Why would your son clean up the bottles from your drunkenness. Clean up yourself and stop letting your kid drink ffs

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ogwez t1_j5n8lwe wrote

You got your 12 year old drunk and had a shower with him? That's creepy as fuck dude, There's no excuse for that. And then made him clean up your mess afterwards? What's wrong with you? I just really hope for your son's sake that this situation wasn't as bad as you made it sound but somehow I doubt it. Fucking sick.

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HAWMadden t1_j5mpzyi wrote

I think some local authorities will be contacting you.

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Wesnye t1_j5mzlpn wrote

Can’t believe people are buying this lol

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Mosher138 t1_j5n4oca wrote

I had a father like you. You're vile.

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YellowHankey t1_j5o3r2r wrote

Child abuse and probably groomed for sexual abuse as well.

Kid asking to shower together? Good grooming OP.

Asking a 12 year old to clean up alcohol? Good parenting.

Kid coming in, me drinking in another room ... (X) doubt.

Seems like kid is being abused on a regular basis but got drunk for the first time and OP decided to share or just made this shit up but is a very bad writer.

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NOT000 t1_j5mtfn0 wrote

hope its bs

otherwise methinks there is much alcoholism in your futures

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TheFirstOfSheila t1_j5omqh0 wrote

Granted, I grew up in the 80s when my friends' parent would give me a sip of their beer but this is a whole new level. This is terrible judgment and parenting. Even drunk, I'd know not to keep giving a 12-year-old wine.

If this is real, you really need to take a long, hard look at the example you're setting for your son.

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River922 t1_j5mf1z5 wrote

You need to stop drinking before someone gets hurt.

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Lynik35 t1_j5mk8cs wrote

you're a moron, L parent

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thereia t1_j5n45jp wrote

You are an alcoholic. Please get help, for your kid's sake.

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[deleted] OP t1_j5ovfuw wrote

This whole fucking subreddit has turned into 1 big bait for people making shit up.

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CuttyAllgood t1_j5qivr7 wrote

This sounds like a 12 year old’s idea of what it’s like to be a parent and to drink.

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thevilestplume t1_j5n2v87 wrote

It’s shit like this that will get child protective services called. Don’t be a dead beat alcoholic father. Like that card has been played out. Do better.

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Empire2k5 t1_j5o4utq wrote

I'm calling the cops and cps.

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cardiB_victim t1_j5p0lu8 wrote

This whole story is wrong. Get help for you and your son

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yohosse t1_j5pwkx2 wrote

weirdest story of all time

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GuyD427 t1_j5ovaut wrote

At 16 maybe, 12… And drunk. Dude…

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dibs8789 t1_j5q9hg0 wrote

Cheeses fucking crust wtf is wrong with you?! Getting your 12 year old drunk is one thing but you showered with him? He asked to shower with you? Are you a pedo? Because thats straight fucked to shower with your 12 year old son. You have issues and probably shouldn't drink at all

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Ptown_Down t1_j5qfhcr wrote

No parent ever would just openly and shamelessly say "i went into the other room one morning and got out-of-my-mind drunk" so casually.

This is obviously not a real post, imho.

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jahkrit t1_j5okeif wrote

I got too much to say, but just know that you're no different from the rest of the world. I'm 38, alcohol ruined my life once, sometimes we have to hit rock bottom to read between the lines.

−4

JayVoorheez t1_j5oowcq wrote

Speak for yourself. We're not showering with children ffs.

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