I'd laugh, but it's far from the only institution turning a blind eye to what's been going on in the park. I wish I'd known that or I might have pushed back even harder against the trip...

Thank you ❤

I've always trusted my own judgement, I only hope that I was right..

I'll look into this, but I wasn't the only one to notice something wrong here. I want to believe I wasn't mistaken. Have to...

It may come to this...

Exactly what I said, but apparently rumours aren't enough grounds for cancellation lol

Thank you for such a considerate reply!

I've been extremely touched by all the encouragement, and after getting some much needed rest I'm more inclined to agree. Clearly the Devil—and I still believe that is who he was—intended to test my faith and instill fear into my heart. I haven't been without doubt over the years (find me any believer who hasn't) but this has been my life's harshest ordeal.

Understandably so, I suppose, but it is never pleasant to feel one's theology so shaken.

Until there is any true evidence that Satan achieved his implied goal of disturbing God's peace I must assume that he was allowed the baptism for a reason. I must await answers, and trust that all isn't lost as I was so certain it must be in my time of weakness. I must believe that this emptiness I feel is only guilt and fear, which likely the Devil intended, with his tricks and torment.

Since writing my account I've been much reassured by everyone's words, and intend to continue my duties, for all my doubts. If my tormentor returns I hope to rally myself, to challenge the implications of which I've been so afraid.

I'll return with further reports as the weeks go on. As collected as I may sound now I cannot promise I won't be swayed again by what I see or hear.

I plan to. In some ways I regret my mind leaping so immediately to catastrophe, although on so little sleep and so shaken it's only to be expected. After taking a short break for my own well being I hope to return to my post, and continue to pray and reflect. Perhaps all isn't lost as I feared... Time will tell.

Thank you.

I would never consider God fragile, but if you'd witnessed and felt what I have you'd understand my fears. It's less the weakness of God and more the strength of the Devil that concerns me.

I intend to commit myself more than ever after everyone's encouragement. I always believed a modern approach to the bible's teachings was the way forward— my mistake, for clearly it's set me up for failure. I intend to fortify myself against any further visitations, although what weapons I have that will prove strong considering the little effect of the Holy Water I am unsure. Perhaps it's as you say, and as I've always personally believed, until this event: prayer is the strongest guard against evil.

I only hope that this is true.

Initially that's what I believed too, but the fact he was strong enough to touch the church door alone disputes many of the beliefs I once held and preached. If I haven't yet expressed how thoroughly this event has shaken my belief system, I'll say it now: as strong as my faith has always been, what else about the abilities of the Devil and his followers do we truly not know? If I have any further experiences leading from this incident that might shed light on this I'll update everyone.

I wish I could be optimistic but my blood runs cold thinking about every moment of that baptism...

These kind thoughts are getting me through at the moment. I penned all this in a fit of paranoia... I must hold fast and hope that I'm wrong. I can't let myself be shaken...

I suspect He wasn't hoping for reprieve but to gain something from the ritual for malicious purposes. Generally baptism is a way to become part of community, to cleanse, start life anew– generally it's seen as a positive step. It's only the atmosphere of the church and the Devil's asides that led me to believe that being baptised, for him, had more unpleasant benefits.

It's a gut feeling, I could be wrong; however I've never once felt that God wasn't listening in some capacity, and that certainty has changed. If He would send some sign— I can't set my hopes so high after what I've seen, but I desperately need it.

Thank you. This brings me a lot of peace. I'll reflect on it.

This is my strongest fear... the worst of it is that I can't even begin to convince anyone of the truth. This is my only chance to warn people. I know it's not enough.