stereonix
stereonix t1_j6o2mu6 wrote
Reply to I 29M Messed up with someone 27F I was talking to and I don't know how to correct the course by [deleted]
> I haven't put anyone on a pedestal like this in the last 10 years
That was a huge mistake. She's a human being just like you and has a life—you made it worse by overreacting to her absence and deleting her when you didn't seem ready to let it go. Once you do those things, you don't get to undo them especially since you haven't known each other long on top of her showing signs of disinterest. I'd say you fucked this one up a little too much, just move on.
stereonix t1_j2djor0 wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in [38M] [31F] I feel weird after my girlfriend stayed out after I went home sick on new years eve by [deleted]
I agree with you, which is why I probably would have asked my partner to come home with me instead of "obviously" saying yes to her staying out. I'm sorry you're alone but I think you did this to yourself here.
stereonix t1_j2dj6a6 wrote
What? Of course there are human beings out there that are willing to be manipulative in order to have a comfortable roof over their heads. Your first mistake was agreeing to talk to her—block her and move on.
stereonix t1_j2dj148 wrote
Reply to [38M] [31F] I feel weird after my girlfriend stayed out after I went home sick on new years eve by [deleted]
If you wanted her to come home with you, it's on you to say that. She can't read your mind and was probably still trying to enjoy her evening. Do you have an idea why this is bothering you?
stereonix t1_iyejsem wrote
Reply to comment by Guzzleman in My (25M) girlfriend/girl I'm talking to (21F) will go hours without answering a text, especially when pertaining to making plans. by Guzzleman
Good luck dude! You deserve someone who enjoys talking to you :)
stereonix t1_iyejgzx wrote
Reply to comment by Guzzleman in My (25M) girlfriend/girl I'm talking to (21F) will go hours without answering a text, especially when pertaining to making plans. by Guzzleman
You've only been talking for a month, I don't think she'd really value your opinion enough to change her behavior or somehow magically become emotionally available/present.
stereonix t1_iyei1g3 wrote
Reply to My (25M) girlfriend/girl I'm talking to (21F) will go hours without answering a text, especially when pertaining to making plans. by Guzzleman
She's not meeting your emotional needs/is not emotionally available enough for you, and you'd be better off focusing your energy on someone who gratefully receives it and reciprocates it.
A guy I'm talking to is doing the same shit to me right now.
stereonix t1_iy9stpn wrote
Reply to comment by ghosttt-2022 in Girlfriend (22f) annoyed that I (24m) won’t go to a show with her by [deleted]
Remind her of that and try your best to maintain a patient tone. I'm sure she's feeling a little lonely while you're busy with work, but don't let her steamroll you or make you feel guilty for doing your job. You both deserve happiness and I'm sorry your job is creating extra stress right now.
stereonix t1_iy9s42h wrote
She's being unreasonable.
"[Gf], you know I love you a lot and I would do what I can to attend something that matters to you—trust me, there's nothing I'd rather do than spend time with you! But you know I'm busy revising for [x amount of time] and I have to prioritize this in the short term if I want to stay on track for [x career goal you have]. I need you to be understanding of that, but let's schedule something so we can still have quality time together. What sounds fun to you?"
If she continues pushing back, I would start to rethink whether you can manage an unreasonable girlfriend and your job at the same time.
stereonix t1_j6p74s8 wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in I 29M Messed up with someone 27F I was talking to and I don't know how to correct the course by [deleted]
Putting people on a pedestal is a textbook toxic behavior—if you're excited about someone, you have to remind yourself to take it slow and still treat them like any other potential partner.
Don't reach out to her and don't expect her to reach out to you. Live and learn