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LemonPartyNZ t1_j9x3d28 wrote

Some good some bad, but that ham is a crime. I’ve seen margarine less processed than that.

78

DrGrilledCheesy t1_j9y2dwt wrote

The crime for me is the halloumi. It's the odd one out. It's a grilling cheese and the only cooked item on it. Serve halloumi either alone or in a salad or wrap/sandwich. Not on a cheese board.

−4

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9yc0j2 wrote

It’s a meme in another community I’m in. To this sub it’s out of place and the whole thing looks like shit (heard loud and clear, I like to get high and watch a streamer and eat cheese.) to a whole other sub, it’s a joke.

11

Swim313 t1_j9xu67p wrote

Looks like an adult sized lunchable… I love lunchables :)

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Regular_Ad_4914 t1_j9wyi7n wrote

Looks like my kids took everything out of the snack drawer and dumped it on the counter

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Chronfused t1_j9z87ok wrote

It’s weird to me that’s there’s two hot cheeses on a snack board but tbh I kinda need to try that now hahaha maybe a fondue with some colder slices on the side lol

1

FerretZealousideal38 t1_ja3cmc2 wrote

Looks like I did an edible, and 2 hours later I started rummaging through the fridge.

1

Maamwithaplan t1_j9xdpqz wrote

I was a cheese and crackers girl even as a poor kid. I would eat dill pickles, saltines, and cheddar.

If you want to punch up your board get some bresaola, make quick pickled veggies (I love red onions), add either grapes or apple/pear, and nuts. I always add olives.

If you like halumi and pita, look up mezza boards! Enjoy your snacks!

45

Jazstar t1_j9xbn0e wrote

Haha I made one of these cheap ones too recently and you know what? It was delicious! Hope you enjoyed as much as I did! I'd recommend adding an apple in next time, I actually really enjoyed pairing it with lots of stuff - plus, it's cheap and filling.

13

Syd_Vicious3375 t1_j9xwjnh wrote

I went to a spa once and they served a small plate of ritz crackers with cheese and green and red grapes. Cheap and simple but it was refreshing af. The sweet fruit really complemented the whole plate.

7

reallamedroid t1_j9xiz8d wrote

I guess some people have taste buds while others dont

−29

Jazstar t1_j9xlld5 wrote

That's pretty rude man. Don't knock other people's food that they enjoy, just be happy that someone is out there enjoying some food that maybe you don't like, but they do. It doesn't hurt you :)

20

loanmagic24 t1_j9x5g1s wrote

I like it and it looks fun to eat :). Not everyone has $100+ to make a professional board. Ignore the negativity. Keep on creating!

12

s0ftreset t1_j9yhnqq wrote

I'm not picky, so I would still eat but to be honest everything looks...pale and boring. I don't know what goes in charcuterie but I would suggest some more colors and contrast. Display is part of it

10

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9zgwej wrote

What if I told you I made this for me

−3

s0ftreset t1_j9zh3po wrote

What if i told you that while you made it for you, you posted it on the internet for others to see and judge. Accept the criticism or don't post things online lol

16

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9zhbfd wrote

I don’t remember asking for criticism on my playing skills. I’m also not adding things I wouldn’t eat

−10

s0ftreset t1_j9zhian wrote

That's the point. You don't have to ask when you publicly post. You just get it.

7

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9wlo04 wrote

Pan fried halloumi, goats milk mozzarella, Gouda aged 12 months, naan bread chips, siracha Nut-Thins, pepperoni, pickles, chicken breast, applewood smoked ham, baked Brie with melted garlic and herb butter, multigrain Club crackers, olive oil chips

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BigSchmeeker t1_j9xc82a wrote

Chicken breast and applewood smoked ham is the fanciest way I’ve ever heard anyone call sandwich meat

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Premier55 t1_j9xsqli wrote

Pickles? Isn’t that slices of cucumber?

2

calpal348 t1_j9yzm9p wrote

This isn’t a recipe. This is a list of items that all came from plastic packaging

1

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9zh6bg wrote

I’m so sorry I didn’t milk the goat for the mozzarella or raise the chicken myself lmao.

0

reallamedroid t1_j9xjalk wrote

Thats definitely not Gouda and garlic doesn't melt.

−12

oxymorgan t1_j9xpsm6 wrote

They clearly described having a melted, garlic and herb infused butter. You are being dense and rude for absolutely no reason to a person who is proud of the dish they created. People like you are why others won’t post the things they’re proud of.

Maybe consider giving an actual critique, or tell OP how to recognize that it isn’t Gouda instead of just being an ass.

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dirtypig796 OP t1_j9y3yec wrote

It was garlic and herb butter, the Gouda is the yellow cheese top right!

3

Jackrabbit61 t1_j9wnwng wrote

Looks yummy! Needs some fruit like grapes etc for colour and more yumminess!

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cookingkville t1_j9yrst5 wrote

Definitely made by a man. I would eat in happily but I’m also a man.

7

jbelle7435 t1_j9z91o3 wrote

A for effort. I would still eat it though.

5

Krapmeister t1_j9y3bcf wrote

Yeah, nahh..

Charcuterie (/ʃɑːrˈkuːtəri/ (listen) shar-KOO-tər-ee, also US: /ʃɑːrˌkuːtəˈriː/ (listen) -⁠EE; French: [ʃaʁkyt(ə)ʁi] (listen); from chair, 'flesh', and cuit, 'cooked') is a French term for a branch of cooking devoted to prepared meat products, such as bacon, ham, sausage, terrines, galantines, ballotines, pâtés, and confit, primarily from pork.[1]

3

Billy5Oh t1_j9ya9wh wrote

Me: Mom can we buy charcuterie?

Mom: No, son, we have charcuterie at home.

The charcuterie at home.

3

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9ycsg6 wrote

I grew up living on spaghetti with butter. I’m very happy to be able to spend money on cheese that isn’t Kraft singles. This slapped and I would absolutely do it again.

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Billy5Oh t1_j9ye97t wrote

I’m just meming on you, would eat this any day of the week.

3

CoolingKing t1_j9xm88g wrote

Posting food on Reddit is a dangerous game. It looks fine, the fried cheese and pickles are what I am eating first. Cheers!

2

Zoehelen t1_j9xuim9 wrote

add prosciutto next time!!

2

Adri-M t1_j9ya1wa wrote

I like that it is affordable. Not all of us can buy expensive ingredients. Looks tasty!

2

thefakemgioia t1_j9yo7y1 wrote

The grilled halloumi is next level

2

agestam t1_j9wwb4c wrote

It's probably yummy, but it's also kinda weird

1

CkoockieMonster t1_j9xsc6f wrote

What's the besst kind of cheese to put on a charcuterie board?

1

MrG_doesntdodrama t1_j9y1unn wrote

I charcutuerid myself. Peace. I'm out and so is this.

1

chaoticsquid t1_j9y7usz wrote

Maybe it's cheap but I'd eat it

1

Noise_Mysterious t1_j9yrvr9 wrote

Love it but for aesthetics, I think using darker board would give better contrast to make your platter stand out

1

calpal348 t1_j9yzfft wrote

How did you bake the tiny little pita breads in that shape and what were your ingredients for making the pickles?

1

Starbellyyyy t1_j9zf8mn wrote

She didn’t make them I don’t know why homemade is in the title these are store bought mini naans I get the brand stone fire

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dirtypig796 OP t1_j9zgp74 wrote

Read the about section. I could still use home made even if I did only put it together.

0

Starbellyyyy t1_j9zd6p2 wrote

This looks like something my 10 year old brother would make for himself 🤣

1

-lastochka- t1_ja0rwn5 wrote

need something sweet in there to balance everything out (jams are the most popular choice), but otherwise perfectly edible

1

Muffinsgal t1_ja0r1gv wrote

Charcuterie: “the culinary art of preparing meat products”……or just cutting open the ham package and slapping it on there.

0

extrabigcomfycouch t1_j9xi4o0 wrote

Yumm, all good combinations! One tip, work on your presentation. Smaller pieces of meat so that it’s easy to portion with the crackers, and place the matching cheese with the meat and veggie pairings.

−1

Kenneth4581En t1_j9xj382 wrote

wow . can I taste some?? looks yummy

−1

Sweet-haibt33 t1_j9xkepe wrote

oh wow. makes me hungry more

−1

Premier55 t1_j9xslfr wrote

Where’s the…? Yeah lots of things missing. A bit of caramelised onion chutney wouldn’t go a miss. Maybe some tapenade.

−2

dirtypig796 OP t1_j9yckrv wrote

No. No it wouldn’t have, I won’t eat caramelised onions.

0

reallamedroid t1_j9xi9rs wrote

Look up the meaning of charcuterie. This is not it. Nothing looks homemade either.

−3

LeGuizee t1_j9xe6j0 wrote

Don’t wanna be rude but you should look a bit further and check the dozens of charcuterie boards posted on this sub and other. This looks like you put the least amount of effort possible and just threw a bunch of snacks on a cutting board

−5

_whitepeaches t1_j9xfkfe wrote

Y'all need to relax and lower your standards. This board was obviously made by a man! 😂

−6