[deleted]
Comments
mailordermonster t1_j19ijot wrote
I'm with you. This is BS. There's a reason that anal requires a lot of lube and foreplay. Unless she's got a vacuum ass that's sucking up lube, there's no way a "good sized" dick is getting in without the dick owner realizing. Even then, hed notice the difference. Would probably also result in anal tearing if she were riding him so hard that she managed to get fully penetrated in one bounce.
thewickedwitch1312 t1_j19qela wrote
Actually had the exact same thing happen to me, bodily fluids are a hell of a lube. It slid right in, one stroke, and I was down. He immediately noticed what had happened and just held me while I cried from shock. I agree that the most unbelievable part of the story is that he didn’t notice. He surely should have noticed.
frewrgregr t1_j198rs8 wrote
Right on
Inphearian t1_j19etmp wrote
Am dude, I always know.
lol_admins_are_dumb t1_j19itla wrote
This has happened with my wife and I. The thing about anal is that it's so tight because you're anticipating it so you tighten up. But if you're not expecting it, it is possible to slip in. And especially if you're wearing a condom or using lots of lube, it's not that impossible to not notice after just a single thrust.
What happened to my wife at the time is that she took it just fine, but as soon as she realized what had happened, she started freaking out, which caused her to tighten up, which THEN made me immediately realize what happened and it started to hurt her a lot.
baucher04 t1_j19zk19 wrote
hey, it's gone. You were right. haha
Zestyclose-Exam1160 t1_j19wmrh wrote
Penis size matters here too
[deleted] OP t1_j19n4jv wrote
[deleted]
butthemsharksdoe t1_j1a8kry wrote
Clearly you are not a guy who has had vaginal/anal sex.
Ktulu789 t1_j19noci wrote
You're all wrong, when she's in certain positions (like doggy or reverse cowboy) and very wet, the D can go anywhere. And boy! Does it go in terribly easy.
For one thing, those positions make the D point down, when normally erected it will point up. For another, if it's fully lubricated and both are also sweating it will slide in like a fish in your hands. It has nothing to do with how big the anus is. In this case is her entire body weight pushing on a D.
It's bad because you never want that to happen and it hurts like hell but it's an accident and I guess that you may not even notice if you're not watching, maybe just enjoying the moment.
[deleted] OP t1_j195f62 wrote
No he felt it he just thought I tightened my 🐱
chenhanlin t1_j196h44 wrote
I’m surprised his dick didn’t break then if it was that tight…had to be a smooth entrance and big enough opening
Ktulu789 t1_j19o7p6 wrote
If the dick is hard it won't twist/break. I'm with OP from experience (sadly). So far, it happened to me twice in my life with different partners. It's not something I liked.
Sipyloidea t1_j19b3gc wrote
Most likely she was just very wet. It's not unthinkable with a large amount of (natural) lube.
[deleted] OP t1_j196xak wrote
I literally have a video 😭😭 am I allowed to post it here
skochiefs t1_j199tor wrote
Pooooossst it
Shwalz t1_j19ccw5 wrote
Post it already
USER_NAME-Chad- t1_j19hrkd wrote
Post it to your profile!
chenhanlin t1_j19c7f1 wrote
Getting tempted huh…you could post it on your own subreddit profile. Put NSFW
Yeeting_Person t1_j19bbig wrote
Post it
SociallyAwkardRacoon t1_j19kszy wrote
This applies to all the other replies lol 😂
Chaossilenced t1_j19l5k6 wrote
Your chatting absolute bollocks it did not happen
SallyHeap t1_j196ogb wrote
The ass feels like an o ring because it's basically just the sphincter and then open intestine, the vagina feels like a handshake because the opening isn't any tighter than the walls.
maexx80 t1_j1973fr wrote
And said sphincter will rip your dick bloody if you just hammer it in without preparation or lube
SallyHeap t1_j19c7oq wrote
Not to mention the tearing and blood from slamming a duck into a delicate asshole without lube.
machisuji t1_j19esc0 wrote
I condemn this kind of animal cruelty.
SallyHeap t1_j19mhr0 wrote
Goddammit Autocorrect! I NEVER mean duck!!
TheReal-Chris t1_j19u2ak wrote
What’d that duck ever do to you?
Feynnehrun t1_j19k8ks wrote
Quack
Elderberry1923 t1_j1a1ejw wrote
Dicks fly together
Feynnehrun t1_j1a4bg6 wrote
Only the ones of a feather.
Elderberry1923 t1_j1a1das wrote
What type? A mallard? Or a little rubber on?
SallyHeap t1_j1a50o2 wrote
Howard The
thewickedwitch1312 t1_j19r94k wrote
No. A lot of the tightness and pain comes from mental anticipation; if you are in the middle of vaginal sex and you are not anticipating anal, your asshole flares open and closed by itself. It is very very easy for it to slide in, and by the way, vaginal wetness is lube! Literally a natural lubricant. And if the sex is good, theres a lot of that to go around.
whatsmypasswordplz t1_j1a4xg7 wrote
I got "surprised" this way when I was younger, it barely got in before I was basically climbing up the wall to get away because it hurt so bad. I guess everyone is different
iPod3G t1_j191ia4 wrote
“I swear to Michael Jackson!”
Sir_Penguin21 t1_j19cw3v wrote
It’s an older reference sir, butt it checks out.
DadOnTheInternet t1_j19gn6d wrote
Heh butt
mtl_jim t1_j19ioqf wrote
Heehee
OptimusSublime t1_j18z40i wrote
press x to doubt
d_an1 t1_j1908n3 wrote
x
Klutzy_Potato1025 t1_j19fqw6 wrote
x
Leviathan41911 t1_j19j4c8 wrote
x
plighter t1_j19k1e1 wrote
x
[deleted] OP t1_j1911ua wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j19e9t0 wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j191f56 wrote
i’m being so fr…
420cortana420 t1_j18xq8v wrote
Proof or it didn’t happen 📸
[deleted] OP t1_j18zcpl wrote
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420cortana420 t1_j18zffo wrote
Sigh… link?
[deleted] OP t1_j18zuq6 wrote
HAHA we actually just recorded it on my phone it’s not posted anywhere
chenhanlin t1_j196jeh wrote
We’ll see it on the hub in a few years then sigh
[deleted] OP t1_j1970be wrote
[removed]
msnmck t1_j19ckx7 wrote
You may have just created a new category.
Markamanic t1_j19edeu wrote
Oh, there's plenty of accidental anal vids.
Source: trust me.
Cichlidsaremyjam t1_j19fvqs wrote
This guy porns
Markamanic t1_j19waw3 wrote
I earned my stripes.
Most of them are rugburn.
Guinnessnomnom t1_j19f0ow wrote
I hardly know this person but I now trust them with my life.
[deleted] OP t1_j198oxk wrote
[deleted]
chenhanlin t1_j19cgm0 wrote
Cha Ching $$$
AlternActive t1_j19pybq wrote
Nice excuse to promote your shity (ha) stuff. Reported.
PocketDog t1_j19f2iq wrote
We need a word to describe having sex for money
Kendovv t1_j19h6ap wrote
Rn best decision u could make is to start an of with say a 5-10 dollar subscription and say if ppl want to see it they need to pay. You'll make a quick few bucks guaranteed. You might even me able to kickstart a decent of career from just this post.
420cortana420 t1_j19058l wrote
r/painal post here… thank me later👍
lavenderrabe t1_j191cgl wrote
I was gonna say, if you actually wanna make some money from it r/painal is a good place to try lmao
[deleted] OP t1_j193c1c wrote
wait pls explain more🤨
LilTeats4u t1_j19cj5f wrote
Just post it and they’ll contact you
bybeardandthrone t1_j19goin wrote
Lmfao don't pretend like you were recording for anything other than a paid video on a porn site.
[deleted] OP t1_j19gu50 wrote
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amplify06 t1_j197u04 wrote
Don't threaten me with a good time... might be willing to take you up on it.
WarpedCore t1_j19fxht wrote
The fuck man... Just throw on some Porn Hub.
realjb69 t1_j19foxr wrote
This story is sus lol
tossaway69420lol t1_j19i5lj wrote
TIFU: I had da sexxy sexx sexx sexx lolz42069
mtl_jim t1_j19itcb wrote
Why? Sounds legit to me. Unless you were there
realjb69 t1_j19janl wrote
I mean someone who’s a “good size” just doesn’t slide in balls deep like this lol
Crash4654 t1_j19jg09 wrote
Dicks and buttholes don't work anything like this story. If it played out like she says then somebody would be extremely injured in this setting, either with a broken dick or ruptured colon. Blood would be involved
mtl_jim t1_j19jmfh wrote
Thanks for the anal lesson
lobo_locos t1_j19dczj wrote
MagicHDx t1_j19fp7l wrote
Doesn’t work like this but okay girl.
foxrun89 t1_j19e6o1 wrote
Lol this horse shit
[deleted] OP t1_j19eays wrote
Lol you probably just want the video 💀
foxrun89 t1_j19eenk wrote
Nah, Im all set dog.
autolockon t1_j19eyji wrote
Ok but I want it
AlwaysThinkingWeez t1_j19l92y wrote
You are clearly a guy. Virgin moment
Xepzero t1_j19fe6p wrote
This sub has gone to shit
Edit: OP you degenerate
SpaceAgePotatoCakes t1_j19lcfm wrote
The stupid OF ads are back again.
Stock_Regular8696 t1_j196b67 wrote
I feel like you broke some laws of physics here. I'm surprised the dick is okay and not in a state of medical emergency. What you described is the #1 cause of broken cocks.
[deleted] OP t1_j196u79 wrote
No like it went in PERFECTLY but i hopped off so quick. I was in reverse cowgirl on my feet if that makes sense. It surprisingly didn’t bend
naynaythewonderhorse t1_j19jmna wrote
That makes the story even worse! You don’t just “hop off so quick.” Lol.
Benching_Data t1_j19i165 wrote
Whoever wrote this has never tried anal in their entire life.
[deleted] OP t1_j19i63q wrote
Read the part when I said I’ve only gotten the tip in
Benching_Data t1_j19inkc wrote
I can tell you for a fact if you're saying your boyfriends dick went all the way in either hes built like a pencil or you're built like the M4. It would never happen, or you'd be in excruciating pain and probably bleeding from the experience. Literally anyone who has even attempted anal will tell you it is not something you can just do on a whim, it takes preparation and time
Go outside for a bit kid
Dimalen t1_j1948fa wrote
Why are so many people bouncing on top and not grinding? And then when pointed out that you can grind, they act like the surprised Pikachu. WHYYY?? (Not shaming, so apologies in advance, it just surprised me so much)
It's just weird because my first instinct was to grind and we adore it, also my partner had partners before and he is also surprised with the bouncing thing.
So, why?
420cortana420 t1_j194wd7 wrote
Different strokes for different folks, personally I find grinding painful and not as pleasurable for me; if my partner is into it that’s another story.
d4m1ty t1_j199khq wrote
My wife likes it doggie and pounding and if I am not pounding enough, she pounds her ass back.
Grinding doesn't do shit for her.
Dimalen t1_j19bbf5 wrote
Yeah we also pound when doggie, I mean when the girl is on top, otherwise it's pounding for me as well
HeywoodPeace t1_j19f1rx wrote
I had a woman do the grind thing. My boy lost interest pretty quickly. I felt nothing.
Dimalen t1_j19fde1 wrote
Would like to see how you do it actually, curiosity kills me how it can be like this for you. I just wonder if we do it the same way? You get me 😅
HeywoodPeace t1_j19wcx0 wrote
Are you asking me for vids, because I hardly know you. Maybe we could get drinks first
Dimalen t1_j19jwxc wrote
Also I just realized that maybe I am not clear - but the dick is inside, right? Because this is how I mean it. Not grinding ON the dick while it lays on the stomach but it is inside
HeywoodPeace t1_j19w3tn wrote
Yes, but what I feel when having sex is the sliding in and out, long strokes. When a woman grinds she enjoys rubbing her clit against the guy's pelvis, but the guy gets a mild foreskin adjustment similar to what pants do when you shift in a chair
1mpri t1_j1970vo wrote
I dont feel like grinding game me anything ever. It feels nice for her i guess ?
So i can ask u why the grinding ? :D
Dimalen t1_j19b7mi wrote
The pressure gives a stronger sensation in the right places I think, also it looks sexier to me, and grinding btw is also more pleasurable to my partner rather than bouncing, like we've been together for almost 4 years and we maybe tried bouncing once for experiment, so this is why it surprises me:D
So again, I hope it does not come as I judge it or think it's the wrong way, it's just that "being in the field" for a while and listening to my friend's experiences it's just weird to me that someone bounces? And it looks also awkward to me I don't know why, like, not sexy, especially when someone writes that they squatted while bouncing, it's like .... HOW AND WHY?
Also I am from a European country if it counts, because despite me having been to the USA before, I still realize that while both our worlds are the digitalized, civilized worlds we are very different TO THE CORE! It is interesting haha
Btw we recently watched a Bill Burr interview I think with Joe Rogan? And there he was talking about how it felt painful while the woman grinded because the woman being shaven hurts him while grinds and we just watched baffled like... HOW DO THESE PEOPLE FUCK THERE?? WHY DO THEY HAVE THESE ISSUES WHEN NONE OF OUR AQUINTANCE DOES?😂
Sorry I realize my surprise and experience may give you the same reaction I have regarding bouncing, it's just weird haha
Alwayspuzzles t1_j19abgn wrote
Before my current partner I have not even enjoyed being on top and Ive tried both grinding and bouncing. It didn't feel like anything to me My previous partners have only enjoyed bouncing so I have done it for them. With my current partner grinding feels great for both of us. So from my experience I just think people are built differently and because of that fit better in different ways.
Dimalen t1_j19bo6i wrote
Yeah it must be the anatomy most of all, so weird that we are THIS different. Hope everyone finds those who is perfect for them ❤️
Alwayspuzzles t1_j19cdbr wrote
Yea it is strange and I hope so til! I always assumed it was me who was built different when Ive read so much about how it is other womens favourite position. But I realise just now that I have had a different favourite position with every partner ^^
Dimalen t1_j19dzj3 wrote
For sure! Also I think the other reason why it surprises me is when someone advises the grinding instead of bouncing, so many times the answer is "hmm I will try, didn't think about it" is so weird to me. That it's not even an option for many and the default action is to bounce
WarpedCore t1_j19g39h wrote
Since it was being filmed...Cinematic Effect is my guess.
Dimalen t1_j19hiug wrote
No, I mean sometimes in sex-related subs when there are questions or anything, many people mention how they bounce in general during sex, and the grinding was never an option for them. So even when no filming involved
[deleted] OP t1_j19mod5 wrote
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canttouchmypingas t1_j19hx95 wrote
Anyone who believes OP is a virgin, including OP
88BlueBeard t1_j193fz1 wrote
Next time, use butt plug to avoid this exact scenario. ;)
Amasterclass t1_j194l0v wrote
[deleted] OP t1_j19j3ru wrote
[deleted]
Klutzy_Potato1025 t1_j19gr5e wrote
oh so this is the reason why they use it while sehgs in live porn i was always confused, thankyou
_Blackstar t1_j19120m wrote
MattDaddyDaddyMatt t1_j19lzo0 wrote
That was glorious.
ZL0J t1_j198ver wrote
🐂 💩
summidee t1_j199uaq wrote
Look at OPs past posts.
partanimal t1_j19koci wrote
She is toxic AF.
kombuchachi t1_j19it15 wrote
How fucking weird to reference a rape scene from a show for comparison. You have issues dude.
BertzReynolds t1_j19hfdt wrote
Sure.
Zeronality t1_j19irzu wrote
This is such a BS story
WolvoNeil t1_j19je12 wrote
I too have sex fellow teens, but you wouldn't know my girlfriend she goes to another school
cregsmumsbush t1_j19ahvz wrote
You cant tell a story like and not share the video
HamburgersOfKazuhira t1_j19l18e wrote
/r/nothingeverhappens
[deleted] OP t1_j1977pp wrote
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hypnotic90 t1_j19k4oe wrote
Yeah this is bs.
pmaurant t1_j19k9p7 wrote
Even people with lots of experience receiving anal sex would be hurt.
JohnnyBandito t1_j19kfsf wrote
Share video, covering face of course, or it didn’t happen
ElectroStaticSpeaker t1_j19mhh9 wrote
So this is ultimately a way to advertise your OF eh?
[deleted] OP t1_j19nadh wrote
I don’t even have one bruh that’s why i said i’d make one
[deleted] OP t1_j1912dv wrote
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OkVolume1 t1_j192f6a wrote
One guy, two holes.
[deleted] OP t1_j195a91 wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j1965yz wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j198msy wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j199q8y wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j19fq3t wrote
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keen-draught8234 t1_j19hgn0 wrote
+1 for you posting proof.
AlwaysLurkNeverPost t1_j19hhef wrote
I think the worst case scenario of "my dick broke" is way more likely here
[deleted] OP t1_j19hssj wrote
[removed]
krishisnotmyrealname t1_j19hxzo wrote
4/10
assmblyreq t1_j19i399 wrote
The truly worst outcome from those girl-on-top positions is the greatly increased likelihood of fracturing your man's penis.
MissRaffix3 t1_j19in6t wrote
Wouldn't you feel it start to enter your ass before it's literally all the way in there tho?
Stock_Regular8696 t1_j1ao55s wrote
They were banging at mach 12 speed
[deleted] OP t1_j19j42b wrote
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baucher04 t1_j19j5sf wrote
I read "hiding" and was very confused by the post itself, until I reread the heading of it.
also, you would have passed out if that really happened, lol.
[deleted] OP t1_j19j9qc wrote
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ClankyBat246 t1_j19jftl wrote
Do be careful... ass/vag wall is thin and can break/fracture easily.
I'm told the recovery time and potential medical treatment is long and painful with higher risk than expected.
IdiotSync t1_j19jry5 wrote
Sooo… you’re into anal?
plighter t1_j19jz48 wrote
Why do people feel the need to make up shit like this?
OakeyAfterbirthBabe t1_j19lfzs wrote
What do you mean? People "fall" on all sorts of items all the time and this happens. Lol
plighter t1_j19miah wrote
If you accidentally ram your cock up someone's arse, you won't just go "oopsie".
This fiction was written by someone who has never done anal.
OakeyAfterbirthBabe t1_j19mrwx wrote
Sorry forgot to add the /s cause you clearly didn't get that I was joking
[deleted] OP t1_j19k7n6 wrote
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Zwavelwafel t1_j19klgn wrote
🧢
[deleted] OP t1_j19kzx6 wrote
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[deleted] OP t1_j19l1b3 wrote
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dytrlove t1_j19l8n0 wrote
One guy (not that big and i had experience with anal) went into my ass while missionary without even noticing. I enjoyed it
AlwaysThinkingWeez t1_j19lbuc wrote
OP is 100% a virgin guy
[deleted] OP t1_j19me3x wrote
[deleted]
[deleted] OP t1_j19n6om wrote
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LPPrince t1_j19nbn6 wrote
Sounds a bit doubtful but that’s one way to advertise
FettyWapsLeftEye t1_j19nn3o wrote
So where’s the video?
[deleted] OP t1_j19o71s wrote
[removed]
Obvious_Drink2642 t1_j19rd3r wrote
If someone read this before they deleted their account can you explain what happend
[deleted] OP t1_j19cia5 wrote
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Electrical_Safe4685 t1_j19hx98 wrote
This happened to me once!
I was on top, sorta missionary but with her legs folded up to her chest. I was doing what wet called the "Rabbit"... self explanatory.
I was going as fast as possible with maximum thrusting, it was going great, she finished twice. Apparently I over stroked and I went balls deep in her ass, came out and went right back into her vagina, in the same stroke.. She screamed bloody murder and smacked me in the mouth. We weren't strangers to anal, she loved it actually! But that time, no preparation, no warning. We never did that position again. She was crying for a while after too.
[deleted] OP t1_j19i8je wrote
YES THANK YOU omg
Electrical_Safe4685 t1_j19qnof wrote
I love Crab Rangoon. I'd say I'm a bit of connoisseur on the hunt of the best Rangoon ever.
timeflux123 t1_j19kus2 wrote
Um...ouch. lucky he didn't bend.
MotoHULK t1_j19guvc wrote
This will be the butt of many jokes
Kaiser93 t1_j19hfnu wrote
> I said “It went up my ass” and he said “OH SHIT”
Appropriate reaction.
Hi-Rezplz t1_j19hper wrote
🧢
[deleted] OP t1_j199h2n wrote
[deleted]
[deleted] OP t1_j19cpnn wrote
Cause I thought it was funnier than saying i stg
BacilQadir715 t1_j19gg8o wrote
U cant just mention a video without posting it. The people wanna see.
P.S if ur not sure if u should post it dm me i will check to see 😉
faustinesesbois t1_j197t8a wrote
Once in this position, his dick just slit open my vag. Would not recommend as well. Edit : thnx for the downvotes you virgins
Kendovv t1_j19gdi0 wrote
His what did what...
faustinesesbois t1_j19n1ko wrote
Yes ! Like it fell out as i was quickly going down. It ripped inside of the side of the vulva on 2 cm in like 2 mm deep. It bled a little but it was not painful luckily !
Kendovv t1_j19ne1y wrote
I think I can picture it. Dude had a razor cock.
faustinesesbois t1_j1aaab0 wrote
It was not wet enough i think
Sarbearr_x t1_j199jr1 wrote
Omg you poor thing 😭😭😭 I’m glad you’re okay now! It was kinda funny!
[deleted] OP t1_j19cq42 wrote
LMAO THANK YOU
More_Impact9752 t1_j18yw6h wrote
OMG!!! The laugh I just had. At least you lived to tell the tale. Lol
[deleted] OP t1_j18zew2 wrote
HAHA i’m glad it made you laugh. My insides are still bruised 💀 i’m scared for when I have to take a shit
maexx80 t1_j1945zw wrote
Yeah ... A guy ramming his dick into an anus at speed will most definitely not say "oooopsie what happened" and not feel it. Unless your anus somehow is gaping wide open. This is creative writing.