TIFU by sending my kids the penis emoji thinking it was a vegetable

Submitted by dazablue t3_ztzct4 in tifu

My kids and I are not prudes, but we just don't ever discuss sex or specific body parts as they are used in intercourse.

Earlier today, my (3F) adult children and I (mom) were in a group text about nothing. One of the kids sent a text that was completely unimportant and meaningless mostly, like a picture of her gigantic spaghetti squash. Feeling like I should at least acknowledge receipt, I decided to answer with an emoji. I have an android phone, so I clicked the little emoji icon, then for whatever reason, I clicked the Food section, and I don't know why but that purple eggplant just spoke to me. I clicked and pressed send.

Shortly thereafter, my oldest asked, Mom, what is happening? Since that was the first message after mine, I answered, "It was the first emoji that popped up." The next message was, WHY WOULD YOU TELL US THAT? followed by a screenshot from the emoji dictionary explaining that the long, purple eggplant is really just used to represent a penis.

In my defense... OK, I don't really have a defense.

TL:DR Today I fucked up when I ent my kids the Eggplant emoji thinking it was an innocuous vegetable only to find out they do not want to know about me making a representative penis pop up

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Comments

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i_like_my_dog_more t1_j1g9hv0 wrote

Tell your kid that sometimes an šŸ† is just an eggplant.

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fliguana t1_j1g9pxe wrote

It's still an eggplant.

šŸŒ®

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-Chris-V- t1_j1gnx2f wrote

Wait, because I have a three year old, I know that you messed up the 3F annotation here. you mean that you have three female children, not that your three year old female child scolded you for using a penis emoji.

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CraftistOf t1_j1ilx6k wrote

TIFU by confusing redditors about my children's age

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PancakeRule20 t1_j1jnx6u wrote

I was wondering if I misread something because that 3 yo would have been a creepy genius

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dclxvi616 t1_j1ga509 wrote

I'd suggest educating these children on the meaning of "context," but you need to take care of yourself before you can take care of others.

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HumpDayFTW t1_j1gpvb0 wrote

As long as you didnā€™t have the šŸ’¦ after it, youā€™re good.

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freddwnz t1_j1i4bsn wrote

It's obviously only a dick in a certain context. If the context doesn't suggest it, then it's just an eggplant lol.

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dazablue OP t1_j1ibka9 wrote

Clearly, my girls are getting a lot more than I am. They have eggplant on the brain.

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HeywoodPeace t1_j1gx41o wrote

If it looks like an eggplant it's an eggplant. TIL it's a dick

I'm not sure what kind of women are using this on social media, but if you can fit an eggplant in there I'm outclassed

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JejuneEsculenta t1_j1iu1rp wrote

Eggplants, like penises, come in many different shapes and sizes. Some are long and thin, some are short and girth, some are shirt and narrow, and others football-shaped and sized.

So... shrug

I suppose that it all depends on your eggplant.

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mytabbykitty t1_j1hoahe wrote

My child is almost an adult child so maybe Iā€™m just getting oldā€¦ I knew the eggplant was used as a penis but I figured the eggplant was a context emojiā€¦ like itā€™s just an eggplant when the context of the chat is foodā€¦. Or when youā€™re emoji spamming someone.

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hmbritt t1_j1glbxn wrote

Ummm.... I'm so glad I never use that emoji because I truly thought it was simply an eggplant as well.

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Setthegodofchaos t1_j1ksgoj wrote

I hate how sexualized the eggplant emoji has become these days. All I see is an eggplant. But it's become so sexualized that now all I see is penis

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PurpleDancer t1_j1k4mj0 wrote

Tell your kids that in your experience and eggplant is no match for a penis

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Freemanscrowbars t1_j1ii2ah wrote

Ngl this is like the reverse of a fear I have, I use Reddit for self happy times. Sometimes later at night. I can sometimes doze off and accidentally hit buttons on my phone. I have several times seen the share prompt up on the screen when I come back to being awake. This usually prompts me to check my texts to make sure I didnā€™t send what I was looking at to a relative.

In bed with my partner who is sleeping as I write this. The line ā€œit just spoke to meā€ made me laugh so hard I caused them to change positions.

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OkVolume1 t1_j1hec04 wrote

Why do we even have an eggplant emoji other than for sexy talk?

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