VacuumInTheHead
VacuumInTheHead t1_jcobjjg wrote
Reply to comment by Michamus in [WP] Everyone knows the hero won't defuse the bomb until the are less than 10 seconds left. That's why I've set it to explode at 20 seconds. by Sh4d0w927
>>blowing during those scenes...
>headspace
Was that a pun?
VacuumInTheHead t1_jad0djh wrote
Reply to comment by Spozieracz in [WP] Tradition dictates that each sentient species is given one seat in the Galactic Parliament. When humanity made contact with the galactic community, it was decided that planet earth deserves to have four senators. by Spozieracz
Make assumptions, humans are pretty fucking good at that. If that isn't good enough then design studies, run experiments, attempt to extrapolate unobtainable data. If you find that to be lacking, just define the words more succinctly to incorporate the obersved traits of other species.
I think, however, that the words are already succinct. We can classify many species according to the definitions of the two words. Of course, jamming 1 million species into a dichotomy is mcfucking stupid. We can use more words, create new words, or eliminate the species that don't fit (which is what we do, historically) (I took a break from writing this for reasons and now I don't know where it was going. This was not intended to be rude or anything; I'm not sure if it could even be interpreted as such. I just thought it would be fun to write)
VacuumInTheHead t1_jacvaz6 wrote
VacuumInTheHead t1_jacspxw wrote
Reply to comment by Spozieracz in [WP] Tradition dictates that each sentient species is given one seat in the Galactic Parliament. When humanity made contact with the galactic community, it was decided that planet earth deserves to have four senators. by Spozieracz
I'm pretty sure the word you meant is sapient, not sentient. There are around 1 million sentient species on Earth
VacuumInTheHead t1_j9q75nb wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP]You're a software engineer who is a communications geek. You learned Morse code. One day, on a whim, you blink "console" with your eyelids. A translucent overlay over everything appears, highlighting items of interest. A realtime programming loop prompt blinks eagerly by livebeta
Me, blinking it with my buthole: 'You have no power here, Eyedolf The Gray'
VacuumInTheHead t1_j8xeljm wrote
Reply to comment by JaxterSmith6 in [WP] In a galaxy that is quite xenophobic and isolationist humanity is the odd one out. We generally like aliens and want to get along. When they turned us down, we redoubled our efforts. Now our fleet is orbiting the alien's home world. We may no longer come in peace, but they will be our friends. by Kitty_Fuchs
Bro, this is hilarious
VacuumInTheHead t1_j8xcb7c wrote
Reply to comment by DoomHaven in [WP] In a galaxy that is quite xenophobic and isolationist humanity is the odd one out. We generally like aliens and want to get along. When they turned us down, we redoubled our efforts. Now our fleet is orbiting the alien's home world. We may no longer come in peace, but they will be our friends. by Kitty_Fuchs
🏆
Here, take a free award
VacuumInTheHead t1_j8nxxha wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] you and a Army of half species successfully captured a purest fortress The group that Sought to destroy all have half species you go down in to there labs and what you found made you’re blood to turn to ice and you would realize their hatred for half species is boundless by [deleted]
I'm am haning a n str💪ornnk
VacuumInTheHead t1_j8j7c85 wrote
Reply to comment by MuseBlessed in Drawing the line between positive use of technology and degeneracy by [deleted]
You can't enjoy the porcelainian chocolate
VacuumInTheHead t1_iycowtc wrote
Reply to comment by Mr__Perry in [WP] You are constantly mocked for having such a weird superpower by all the other heroes. “The power to make anything into perfectly cooked soup”… One day, a massive meteor is barreling towards earth. As all the other heroes are panicking, you wait perfectly calm, at the impact zone, bowl in hand. by WoollerMan2003
He expells farts at faster than the speed of light
VacuumInTheHead t1_iy95wsa wrote
Reply to comment by hornylolifucker in [WP] Your Significant Other has landed a book publishing deal! You're very proud of them, even if you don't actually enjoy their writing. One day, on a whim, you buy an actual copy in a book store. It's nothing like the pages they gave you to read. Nothing. by veriverd
It got multiplied by i and became a plane where Santa and his fat dumptruck can roam free, I guess.
Also, nice username
VacuumInTheHead t1_iy95b5y wrote
Reply to comment by photoshopper42 in [WP] You've spent years on your thesis paper. Today you sit down, hand it to your professor and smirk. "The science of magic?" he asks, looking at you incredulously. In response, you summon a fireball in your hand. by TerrWolf
You should have reminded the readers to swallow, I drooled my shoe onto thr table (I am a linguapod) (I'm not sure why I made this joke)
VacuumInTheHead t1_iwc2po9 wrote
Reply to comment by CringeNibba in [WP]"Why are you just standing there and where is your uniform?! You are here to serve the demon king and we can't have someone incompetent like you, get moving!". I knew I hadn't met most of my lower-ranked generals so he must not recognize me. No matter I want to see how this will play out. by Blackrose_920
Measly folk like us couldn't understand
VacuumInTheHead t1_iuhvirh wrote
VacuumInTheHead t1_iuhmdv3 wrote
Reply to comment by tetsuomiyaki in [WP] "First of all calling me a "filthy troll" is very hurtful, and second of all I put all the labor and expense to build and maintain this bridge on my own, so I think it's quite reasonable to charge a toll unless you want to forge the river yourself!" by RoboJoe9000
got a shtabbin' loiscenze roight 'ere
VacuumInTheHead t1_iugp2pt wrote
Reply to comment by andrius-b in [WP] While shopping for houseplants, you stumble upon a strange-looking sapling in a corner. Its label reads: "Yggsdrasil - The World Tree". Out of curiosity, you buy it and take it home... by nepnerd
This was beautiful enough to make me sad
VacuumInTheHead t1_iugk22v wrote
Reply to comment by Philosopher_1234 in [WP] You are a barista in a 24 hour coffee shop. Every night at 3:33am a demon appears for the Dark Lord's latte. by WarturtleWitch
My sleep deprived brain has gone into hysteric laughter. Very good 👍
VacuumInTheHead t1_iu7u6v7 wrote
Reply to comment by DailyCreative in [WP] "Unfortunately for you only true hate can break the curse!" ,the evil wizard declared triumphantly, "Uh... you mean true love right?", asked the baffled cursed princess, "No, why would I say that?" ,the now equally baffled wizard replied by PotentialSmell
The ending was (quite) smashing
VacuumInTheHead t1_iu4ydbh wrote
Reply to comment by N_ShadowFrog in [WP] You want so badly to be a Hero. But your powers are, frankly, terrifying. Heroes struggle to trust you, and all the older Villains keep trying to mentor you. by pawpaw_git
Are the stray cats to remove the evidence?
VacuumInTheHead t1_iu4y5my wrote
Reply to comment by Quas_NaArt in [WP] You want so badly to be a Hero. But your powers are, frankly, terrifying. Heroes struggle to trust you, and all the older Villains keep trying to mentor you. by pawpaw_git
☠️ (I need a necrodoctor)
VacuumInTheHead t1_iu4mbw1 wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP] A man is a hero to one city, and a villain to the other. He takes pleasure in living both roles. But when the hero of the city the man is the villain of decides to locate his hideout, he bumps into the villain of the other city... fighting the man whom the hero thought was a villain! by Crystal1501
Please put a BrainDamage tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously hemorrhaging in my brain. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the heck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of people hemorrhaging together at this one sentence. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post as BrainDamage.
VacuumInTheHead t1_itzr4jw wrote
Reply to comment by Primary_Active_4719 in [WP] You are a master of of the mind palace technique, so much that you can entertain yourself for hours just spending time in the fictional place you have created inside your head. One day, while roaming around in your palace, you're shocked to find signs of a break-in. by Idionfow
That ending was so unexpected that I burst out laughing. Great writing 👍
VacuumInTheHead t1_itl1qxe wrote
Reply to comment by GrunkleStanwhich in [WP] The year is 3015 and you’re the last person on earth. You’re outside farming and growing your dinner like usual when suddenly you hear a loud, distorted voice from the sky saying “Yeah this planet will do…” by mypoolcaughtfire
I can't tell if it's implied that the MC lives a long time or if alien visits are very common. Anyway, great writing! 👍
VacuumInTheHead t1_itdxyet wrote
Reply to comment by BrightFirelyt in [WP] The hero looks at you shocked and disgusted. "So... your plan is to make a... giant meatball out of every single person on earth...?" Scratching their head they frown and ask, "But, why?" by Affectionate-Row-534
Nice to see a real hero. Great writing
VacuumInTheHead t1_jcyyh2o wrote
Reply to comment by SirPiecemaker in [WP] When you and your team of villians try to commit the heist of the century; you have planned for everything. Except another team of villians who are doing the same thing. Yall fight and your team wins. The heroes show up and congratulate the "heroes" for saving the day. You roll with it. by Splitstepthenhit
Noice